Page 57 of Deviants
Her sudden laugh caught my full attention.
“How old are these?” She held up a box of rubbers that had been sitting on the night stand. “There’s only two left. Rome, I know you didn’t bring me to the trailer you and Dhal used to have basic ass sex in.”
“How do you know it was Dhal?”
“That weir...your father said something about seeing her again after some crazy number of years. Once he took a break from staring at me.” She twisted her lips, looking deep in thought, then shook whatever it was away. “And I was just joking, I’m not that petty. I mean, I am, but I just want to cuddle up with you before we get all bloody.”
I cocked my head and studied her impassively. She sounded sincere enough but this wasn’t her go to MO.
“No demands that I tell you everything you want to know and all about my past? I at least expected you to say something about me having an acquired taste for human meat.”
She sighed and planted her hands on her hips. “I want to know everything there is to know about you, Rome. I want to know how you got those scars under your ink, and how you ended up here of all places with that man. I don’t give a shit about your acquired taste. This is how you were raised.
“As long as there are no human buffets, I’m good, even if it’s gross. Like, really vomit inducing gross. ” She wrinkled her nose. “I want to know how you became the head of the Savages. And why you keep things from me as simple as cellular phones, and how you feel about the baby we seem to only talk in circles about.
“I want to know so many things, and if you don’t want to talk about your past, then at least let me know what’s going on in the present.
“I never got to have a life; you know all there is to know about me. I was treated like a show animal. I was told when to perform and how. When I wasn’t, I was locked in a room with shelves full of porcelain dolls. I fucking hated those dolls. You’re my do over. I get to have a life with you.”
Fuck. I felt like an asshole for once in my life because I didn’t have the words to reply to any of the shit that just came out of her mouth. And for Cali, that was some next level maturity speech she’d just given.
She’d gone right into the kind of logical, emotional rant I avoided like the black fucking plauge. Half-assed honesty was the best policy, right?
“I don’t know how to respond to half the shit you said. There are just some things I’ll never tell you. Not anytime soon.”Or fucking ever,I added silently.
I stood from my position over the pullout bed and went to her. Cali was strong, I would never deny that, but she was fragile too. I’d known it from the first day she woke up in my bed.
If it were some regular bitch that was the catalyst for all this, I wouldn’t have spared her, but this was my queen. I couldn’t tell Cali the deal with her mom because it tied too heavily into my past. I’d reluctantly told her about the deal with Janice.
I didn’t tell her the real truth about Tiffany, or as she knew her, Tilly. I’d added bits and pieces of half a puzzle so she wouldn’t try and save Tito. She took it all in with almost no reaction, simply because they’d all used her.
Tiffany never gave a shit about her. She used her to get close to David based off my order before I knew Cali still existed.
I told him who she was when I could no longer predict her next move. I sent her that night, knowing he would burn her alive.
David had been fucking her for months, thinking she was an outlier slut craving a man with power. Cali never knew about their relationship, and for whatever reason, David didn’t tell her.
He didn’t tell her a lot of things.
How did I fix that? Simple, I wouldn’t. There was so much she didn’t know about it. I constantly pushed her in the directionIwanted her to go in. I was a selfish manipulative motherfucker who had no shame.
I was doing her a favor in the big picture. Cali was out of her head. There was no question about it. She was childishly maniacal and didn’t even realize it. Sometimes, I felt like I was like walking a tightrope of dos and don’ts with this girl.
Fortunately, I knew how to handle her. She was a shattered reflection of myself. She just never knew what to do with the broken pieces.Idid that for her.
Making sure the void inside her stayed dark and dirty was for her own good. Depravity soothed her mind better than any medicine ever could.
In the beginning, it may have been easier to kill her and put her out of her misery, but it was too late now. I couldn’t let go.
Her beautifully twisted soul was mine and I was never giving it back. She made a deal with the devil without knowing the stipulations. I never told her it would be fair, only that it was never-ending.
Our baby was an entire different story. I’d wanted this for a very long time with a woman just like her.
I put my hands on her hips and gave a light squeeze. “I’ll start with the most important thing you said. Don’t ever think I don’t want our baby. I don’t jump for joy and shit when I’m happy, Pixie, you know that. But he ismorethan wanted. I knew what I was doing when I put him inside you.”
She smiled up at me and I kissed the tip of her nose. What I didn’t tell her was that I had a pretty good idea of how she knew she was pregnant in the first place. It made me want to kill those motherfuckers ten times more than I already did. I knew what they’d done as soon as it came to light. I had to let her know he would be fine.
“Don’t worry about him. Once we’re back home, I’ll have the best doctor I can find on standby.” Dropping a kiss to her forehead, I went back to preparing the bed.
