Page 23 of Defiance
“Noted.” Smith turned to Logan. “We actually came to drop off a standard training uniform for Cole. And a couple of guides on pack history. Particularly HRU history.”
Smiling grudgingly as he spotted the books on the coffee table, Logan nodded. “Thank you.”
“No problem.” Smith headed for the door, Rich in tow. “We’ll collect you all for lunch later in the week. Thought it might be easier to meet the team if food is involved.”
“Probably,” Logan replied, pleasantly surprised that someone in the HRU had given some thought to Cole joining them.
“Oh.” Smith stopped in the doorway and glanced back over his shoulder. “We also brought him a laptop. There’s a brief HRU history loaded on there and a couple of videos showing the team in action if you want to watch to see what Cole will eventually be doing.” He paused, smile wry. “Paul thought it’d be a good idea, just so he’s under no illusions.”
Of course he did.
“How thoughtful.” Logan tried his best not to sound sarcastic but, judging by Aaron’s cough behind him, didn’t succeed all that well. Hopefully if anyone was listening, they’d assume it was the usual animosity between teams. The HRU had a reputation for being wankers.
A well-deserved one.
The door closed, and behind him Aaron grumbled, “It’s far too early to deal with Rich’s sparkling personality.”
Logan laughed, some of the tension easing from his shoulders. “Coffee?”
They both turned to look at Cole.
“What?” Cole muttered with a shrug of one shoulder. “You expecting me to make it?”
He’d been quiet throughout the whole exchange, and on closer inspection, Logan noticed how rigid his body was, perched on the sofa with hands clenched into tight fists. What the hell had been going on before they arrived? “No,” Logan said carefully. “Just wondering if you wanted one too.”
“Oh.” He frowned slightly as if it was a difficult question.
“You all right?” Logan asked, keeping his tone neutral, unaffected, when inside worry churned like a swarm of angry bees.
Cole nodded, expression tight. “Yep. Just wonderful.” Yeah, no disguising the sarcasm there.
Glancing at Aaron, then at the cameras, he gave a little shrug of his own. How the hell were they supposed to do this while being monitored all the fucking time?
Aaron raised his eyebrows in an “I don’t know either” way, and then cleared his throat. “I’ll go make us a drink. Cole? What would you like?”
“Um...” His frown was back again. “Coffee.Please,” he added quickly, causing Logan to smile at his manners even in this shitty situation. His mum would be proud.
Logan sat on the chair facing Cole and rested his elbows on his knees. “Seriously, are you okay? Did they say something before we got here?” he asked when Cole didn’t immediately answer. “Did you manage to sleep last night?”
Cole fixed him with such an incredulous expression, there was no way he was putting it on. “Seriously? In the last few days, I’ve lost my home, my friends, myhumanity.And I was informed yesterday that my parents were killed in a car crash.” He stood so abruptly, Logan startled, leaning back quickly. “And my introduction to the pack that’s supposed to become my family was an interrogation, which was little more than torture.” He had both hands in his hair now, gripping the long strands tightly. “And if that’s not enough, I now get to find out”—he waved at the laptop—“in intimate detail that I’m going to become one of those who carries out the fucking torture.” He turned to face Logan, eyes wild. “And if that’s not enough for you, my new team hate me and wish I’d been left to die instead of being bitten.” He drew in a deep breath and blew it out slowly as if trying to calm down. “So in answer to your questions, yes, they said a lot of things before you got here. And no, I didn’t sleep particularly well. I had a couple of things on my mind.”
Aaron appeared, two mugs in hand. “Coffee?” He handed one to Cole, who stared at it for a second, blinked, then took it from him. Aaron glanced at Logan who shook his head the barest amount.Leave it.
Thankfully he passed Logan his drink without comment, and when he came back after fetching his own, he sat quietly, waiting for Logan to take the lead.
How do I handle this?
Is he really this upset or is it for the cameras?Logan wasn’t sure. Body language alone suggested Cole was wound tight and ready to snap at any moment. But he’d known this could andwouldprobably happen. None of it should’ve been a surprise. But knowing it was coming and experiencing it were two very different things.
Carefully setting his mug down, Logan clasped his hands together to stop himself from reaching for Cole. “I know you didn’t have much choice in coming back here, Cole, and I know this isn’t how you imagined your life turning out. But the reality is that you’re part of the McKillan pack now. Michael’s given you a second chance, but he can just as easily take it away. As difficult as it is, you need to try and meet them at least some of the way. This won’t work if you refuse to try and integrate.”
Silence.
Cole stared at Logan, eyes unreadable, and Logan would’ve given anything to drag him into the bathroom and find out exactly what was going on in his head. Was he having second thoughts? Logan wouldn’t blame him, but it was too late for any of them to back out now.
“I know,” Cole said quietly. “But it’s just so fucking hard.” The sincerity in his voice made Logan think this was for real, and he ached to pull him into his arms and tell him it would all be okay. He buried his head in his hands for a second, and Logan shared a concerned look with Aaron.
Aaron nodded to the laptop.
