Page 29 of A Shield Maiden's Earl
Yet as we peaked at the same time and I wrapped her up in my arms, both of us trembling with the intensity of our release,I knew I had no choice but to leave her and our child safely on these shores. And I found the voice to murmur it in her ear soon after because I had no choice.Wehad no choice. Even if I were not devoted to king and country, sayingnoto King Hákon would turn Norway against our tribe, and I could not have that.
“Nor should you,” I said softly, saddened when I finally pulled back and looked at her, only to find her cheeks glistening with tears.
“Did you expect to find anything else?” Freya wondered when I murmured that she should not cry and brushed them away. She rested her hand over her womb and shook her head, pleading with her eyes. “I can’t say what will happen, but nothing good will come of you leaving us, husband, and ’tis crucial you believe me.”
“So you know about our little one,” I said gently, resting my hand over hers.
“Ja, I know,” she confirmed. “So please don’t go.”
“Yet I must,” I repeated, reminding her of all the reasons why, dropping a soft kiss on her lips, followed by another and another. “And I think deep down you know it.”
“I know it could very well mean your death,” she murmured against my lips. “That we might never see you again.”
“Then let us make this night last,” I said between soft kisses. “Let us forget the world around us and be together tonight as man and wife. As dear friends. As lovers and warriors.” I deepened my kisses yet still peppered words in between. “As the Norns, Wyrd, and all the gods would have us.”
While I thought she would continue fighting me with seduction and words, she ended up doing the last thing I expected.
Chapter Thirteen
Freya
Although I knewSoren expected me to continue fighting him about leaving after we made love beneath the tree out back, I did no such thing. Instead, I brought him to bed and lost myself in his arms for the entire night. We never ate or drank, but made love time and time again until dawn broke, and we made our way down to the sea to watch our last sunrise together.
Somehow, I wasn’t surprised it was all the same shades of crimson, yellows, blues, and greens I had seen in the flames the night my sister spoke to me. I said as much, too, before making my way back to our lodge to prepare for his departure while he oversaw final preparations.
Wiping away the last of my tears for now, I braided my hair as I had the day that he’d arrived at my father’s holding and painted my face for war because saying goodbye to him felt like going to battle. Then, I adorned the trousers and tunic I had worn the first day I fought him here at our stronghold, wrapped my bear fur over my shoulders, and sheathed his mother’s sword at my side.
Holding her shield at the ready like my shield-maiden ancestors and with Sten by my side, I made my way down to the shore with my head held high, pleased when many fell in behind me, understanding the honor I meant to show my husband. The days of our Viking ancestors might have passed, but westill carried them in our blood, and I would see Soren sent off knowing such.
As expected, most at the shore who were preparing to leave stopped what they were doing at my approach, including Soren, and our gazes connected across the distance. As it was every time we looked at each other, I felt the palpable energy of our bond, struggling to imagine it not being a part of my life anymore if something happened to him. Truthfully, I wondered how I ever got by without it to begin with.
“Thank you for this, Freya,” he said when he joined me, admiring my appearance. “I’m honored. Might I carry a piece of your warrior spirit with me.” Soren looked past me to the villagers who had followed. “Many thanks to all of you for seeing me off.”
After saying their farewells to him, he bid goodbye to Ivar and Brynhild, embracing his aunt before slipping his hand into mine so that we might walk to his boat together. Doing my best to keep my emotions reined in, I assessed the numerous ships traveling with him as well as his warriors, and all looked in good form.
“I will miss you more than words can say, wife,” he said softly once we arrived at his ship, cupping my cheeks. “Both of you so very much.”
“And we will miss you.” I rested one hand over our child and one over his heart. “May both of us give you strength and protection wherever you may be, and might our hearts beat as one.”
I wasn’t surprised to feel my pendant and talisman warm at my chest, telling me great magic was at work in my words. Magic born of the gods that would bind us three, given that his offspring was as mystical as his mother and me.
“I felt that,” he exclaimed softly, his pupils flaring with awe. “I felt the warmth beneath your hand pulse and fill me.” Heclosed his eyes for a moment, as if cherishing the sensation, then looked at me again. “’Tis like nothing I have ever experienced.”
“’Tis my and our child’s love for you, husband,” I said just as softly. “Love so great that ’twill stay with you. Protect you in ways born of the gods and could very well bond us through the flames, as I’m bonded to my sisters.”
“I can only pray,” he said solemnly, then closed his mouth over mine and kissed me one last time. A deep, soulful kiss that ended far too soon as ships were already sailing and his vessel was next to go.
He looked at Sten, who had remained by my side. “Take care of her and our child, my friend, and I will see you all again soon enough.”
His thick black pelt rippling in the wind, our wolf looked from me back to Soren, his gaze steady and watchful in a way that spoke to him understanding his master’s request. More so, as he remained faithfully by my side when Soren boarded.
Biting back a fresh round of sadness he didn’t need to see right now, I held my head high and my shield proudly, walking down the pier as the ship was untied and the sails raised. Soren and I never stopped looking at each other as the wind caught and his boat lurched forward. Instead, I went to the end of the pier and held his gaze until I could barely see his form in the distance, even as all around me went back to their morning duties and routines. I watched him until all I could make out was his ship’s sails glowing in the morning sun, until even that disappeared into the horizon.
Only then did a tear slip free, and I realized Ivar and Brynhild still stood beside me, watching our ships in the distance until the last one disappeared.
“He will be all right, Freya,” Brynhild said gently, resting a comforting hand on my shoulder. “As you well know, he’s a fierce warrior, and now he has more to fight for than ever.”
“Ja,” Ivar agreed roughly, making himself clear when he looked at me with his typical scowl. “And I will see that what he fights for is well-protected.” He gestured dismissively at my attire and jerked his head once. “’Twas good to dress as you did today.”
