Page 42 of Jealous God
“I know, I know.” Erik grinned “It’s just...”
He wasn’t going to drop it. Just like my father in the past, he was going to push it until I was in tears and running. Was it really so strange that even if I had a good voice, I might not want to use it? I didn’t crave fame and riches and adoring fans. Never had and never would.
“I said drop it,” Jax growled out. “She doesn’t want to sing. I think she made that perfectly clear.”
Erik’s mouth fell open at Jax’s tone. To my right, I saw Louis look away, clearly uncomfortable, and I couldn’t blame him. I was uncomfortable as well. Things had gone weird really quickly. If I had known it would cause an argument, I would have carried on singing, I would. I would have…
“You’re right, sorry, Eli.” Erik folded his tall body into the sand. “I shouldn’t have pushed.” He threw a glance at Jax. One that wasn’t as friendly as the one he had given me. There would be words between them soon, I could tell. “We can talk about it another time.”
I nodded. We wouldn’t be talking about it. And even if we did, my answer would be the same. I did not sing.
Louis cleared his throat, breaking the silence, and it was like a storm had finally broken.
“You ok?” Jax whispered as everyone around us started talking and laughing amongst themselves. His arm around my shoulders tightened.
But I didn’t turn to him. I was too lost in my thoughts, or, more specially, trying to make sense of those thoughts. I stared out into the orange flickering flames until he asked again. Tilting my chin up to him, I nodded. “Yeah, I’m ok, thanks for the save.”
“I got your back, Elodie.” Jax's head dipped, but he didn’t bring his lips to mine. They just hovered there, tantalisingly close. Teasingly close. “You do have an amazing voice, though,” he added in a whisper.
I smiled sadly. “Thank you. I just…can’t.”
“Stage fright, right, or something else?” Back and forth over my face, his eyes roved.
And my skin heated. Ducking my head, I let my forehead fall onto his chest, hiding myself from him. “Something else.”
“Ok, well, let’s forget it.”
My head snapped up to stare at him. “You’re not going to ask me what?”
“No, not unless you want to explain it to me. It’s not my business. Your happiness is.”
I stared at him, speechless. What could I say to that? What possible words could I use to let him know how much that made my heart swell? Pulling his head down to mine, I found his lips with mine, and I put everything I felt into that kiss. Because I did feel something. Chance was right, not that I would ever tell him, but I was already falling for Jax. I couldn’t help myself.
“Whoa, those two are starting already.” Tate laughed, and I pulled away guiltily. Pressing my fingers to my lips, I scooted away, trying to put at least a few inches between me and Jax. Lifting me bodily, he deposited me on his lap.
“Haven’t started anything yet,” Jax informed him with a grin, and his head dropped to my bare shoulder. His lips were warm and soft as he pressed a kiss to my shoulder. I shuddered with longing. “I’ve only got a limited time, you know. I’ve got to make the most of every second.”
Poof. Just like that, the warm feeling evaporated. That’s all we had, a limited time. An expiration date. I had to remember that. Me and Jax were on borrowed time, and pretty soon, we’d be out of it.
* * *
“Cold?”
At first, I didn’t hear what Jax said. I was too busy laughing at something Louis was saying whilst trying to listen to the hauntingly beautiful sound of Dion singing. The others were singing right along with him, trying to drown him out, but I could still hear him clearly. Haunting. That was the only way to describe his voice. It made me wonder why he didn’t do more acoustic work. But maybe he did, and I just hadn’t heard it. I would have to pay more attention to what the guys were bringing out when I got back to the UK. Maybe buy some albums and follow them on their social media.
“Elodie?” Jax said, drawing my attention back to him. “Cold?”
I couldn’t follow Jax. I already knew I wouldn’t be able to handle the never-ending photos of him with other women. And there would be a never-ending stream after me. Jax didn’t do relationships. It was common knowledge. When whatever this was between us came to an end, he would go back to his usual horny rockstar self, or worse, he would meet someone who hewantedto be in a relationship with. One without an end date.
It made me feel sick, and I shivered.
“We could go back to the bus.”
“I’m not cold.” He thought that was the reason I had shivered.
Jax eyes searched mine. He looked genuinely worried, and that somehow made it worse. If he had been the cocksure, arrogant son of a bitch I had first met, I wouldn’t be having all of these feelings. No, he had to be nice. Show the loving and caring side that some lucky woman would get to see after me.
“You’re shaking, baby…” He trailed off as I stood. With my back to the fire, I stared out over the white frothed waves. Arms wrapped around my waist. I was shivering. But not because I was cold. The night air was balmy. Perfect. Just like the night had been. I didn’t want to spoil it by getting emotional.
