Page 29 of Bloody Bones
Tommy
It was torture.
Pure, exquisite torture.
Just watching her slip that damn spoon between her lips was making me so hard that it was impossible to concentrate on anything else. The fact that I wanted her couldn't be denied. But the force of my arousal was surprising even to me.
What was it about the girl in the bed beside me that made my inhibitions lower to the point that I didn't even recognise myself?
“This is the best soup I have ever tasted.” She slurped the vegetable packed liquid up from the spoon, her eyes closing in a little moment of pleasure. I couldn't help the smile that spread across my face. She was hungry, I got that, but it was more than that. The faces she was pulling, the little noises of appreciation, were all almost sexual.
Would she wear the same blissful look when I finally touched her body and brought her to an earth-shattering climax? And I would. I didn't know when, it was still too early to ask anything of her and not expect her to scream and run away. But fate would bring us together. HARD. Already she was feeling the same pull I was. The same need to be close to each other.
Shit.
I shook the thought away. What the hell was wrong with me? I couldn't keep her, Raze was right about that. There would be a reason why Leviathan wanted her found and safe. And it was one that he hadn't bothered to tell me about. That was just the way of it. Leviathan shared only what was absolutely necessary. Even if I asked him outright, I doubted he would tell me.
I couldn't let myself get close to her, and I sure as hell couldn't take her to bed. Not because it would kill me when I had to give her up, which it definitely would, but because it wasn't fair on her either. She was scared and alone, and she had just been through trauma that would scar and haunt her for life. I was the man who had saved her. Her hero. And as much as I loved the thought of being that to her, it meant it would just make her leaving all the harder on her as well.
I had to think about her and not myself. Especially if she was my mate.
Mate.
The word echoed around my head.
I had always assumed finding someone to spend my life with was just a thing that happened to other people. Back when I was young, centuries ago, I had my brother Rawhead. We had each other and didn't need anyone else. Years after his death, when Leviathan had found me, I got a chance at a new family. A band of brothers who were outcasts like me. I had always assumed they would be my life.
I hadn't factored in that there might be a woman out there who the universe had decided was mine. And mine alone. But it was a cruel twist of fate that she would be plucked from me before I even got the chance to really love her and be loved by her in return.
Not that it was surprising. The people I loved always left.
Hell, my brother had taken his own life instead of facing the possibility of spending eternity with me.
Briella's spoon clattered into the bowl, bringing me back into the present, and I raised my eyes to smile at her. “I wouldn't say it was that good. I doubt it's homemade or anything. “
What was wrong with me? I was stammering over my words over damn soup.
Blinking her eyes slowly, she met my gaze and her smile was a little uncertain. “It was delicious,” she repeated.
“Did Acco even feed you there?” The moment I said the words I regretted them. She winced at the sound of Acco's name. Instinctively I reached out to touch her. My fingers falling short, I let my hand hover in the air between us.
I had to stop doing that. Reaching for her like she was mine. She wasn't. She never would be.
“It’s ok, Briella, we don't have to talk about it.”
We would have to soon. Levi would want a debriefing. But it didn't have to be tonight. She needed to rest. Things would look better after a good night's sleep.
At least I hoped it would.
“Do you want more? I can get you more?” I stammered.
She nodded. Her bottom lip disappeared between her teeth again. It was her nervous habit. And as sexy as I found it, I hated seeing her hurt herself like she was.
I growled before I could stop myself. And her eyes widened at the sound.
“I…I...” she stammered.
Jumping up from the bed, I put some distance between us again. Why did I have to go and ruin it by losing control? She had been terrorised by a monster, and there I was acting like one just because she bit her lip. I had to learn to control myself around her before I scared her straight into a straitjacket. It was already surprising that she wasn't a hysterical mess.
