Page 18 of Cyber
9
Iris
It wasstrange how easily I adjusted to life with a permanent Monster shaped shadow. He was always there, hovering in the background. A comforting figure of contradictions with his angelic face and leather cut.
Never in a million years had I thought I would enjoy a man’s company as much as I did his. There was just something about him that put me totally at ease. Maybe it was the fact that in the two weeks we had lived together, he hadn't looked at me with anything resembling lust in his face. He didn't leer or make crude comments.
He was just Monster.
Safe, dependable Monster.
Although he had laughed when I had mentioned that to him. I hadn't understood that laughter, and when I had tried pressing him on it, he had just shrugged and said, “I wouldn't hurt you, that's all that matters, Iris.” Like it answered the million questions I had about him.
“That guy is staring at you.” He elbowed me softly as we walked side by side down the bread aisle of the local supermarket. Startled, I looked over and his booming laughter filled the air. “Subtle, Iris, subtle.”
I blushed. It had been so long since someone had looked at me as Iris the woman and not Iris the whore, or worse, Iris the victim, I didn't know how to react. The man in question was good looking enough. He had a friendly face and dark, artfully styled hair. And he was indeed staring at me.
“No, he's not.” I ducked my head.
“Liar, liar, pants on fire, Iris.” Monster elbowed me again. “You know he watches you every time we come in here. Why don't you ask him out? I’m sure he will say yes.”
I stopped, and the rolls I had been holding fell from my hands. “Don't tease, Monster.” I bent at the waist to pick them back up.
“I'm not teasing. He likes you.”
“One.” I straightened. “He probably thinks I am with you, and he might actually be looking at you. Maybe you should ask him out.”
It was moments like that I felt normal. When casual onlookers might actually think I was a happy, carefree girl. And that's exactly what I wanted them to think. I was getting better at faking it. The darkness was a little less black, and the almost happy moments happened more often. But I would never be truly happy until Violet was back at my side. The more time that passed, the less likely it felt that it would happen.
“Maybe I will.” Monster shrugged his shoulders. “He's pretty cute.”
I shot him a look. Was that the reason he never leered at me? Was Monster gay? Not that I would ever ask, who he found attractive was none of my damn business. But it would make sense.
“He is,” I admitted, looking over my shoulder again. He wasn't Cyber good looking. He didn’t drip sex appeal and danger, but there was something cute about him. Like he was safe. I needed safe right then. “What about Cyber?”
Monster didn’t answer. Instead he studied the shelf like it was the most interesting thing in the world. “What about him?”
I choked on my words, spluttering, and his hard hand came down on my back.
“Iris, if you have feelings for Cyber, you should probably admit them to yourself so you can work out your own mind. He likes you. Everyone knows that.”
I huffed, my shoulders slumping. “He's whoring around isn't he? That's why he hasn't come by with an update on Violet.”
“He will find her. There's no one more capable.”
He didn't try to deny the whoring about part. I shouldn't have felt upset about it. It was irritating, because I did. But I needed him if I was ever going to get Violet back. And that's all I wanted.
“Fine.” Straightening my shoulders, I thrust the rolls into Monster’s arms and his eyes met mine.
“Where are you going?”
Pointedly, I looked in the direction of the other shopper. The one that seemed to always be there when I was.
Throwing back his head, Monster laughed, his white teeth flashing and the checkout girl sighed loudly, making me roll my eyes.
“Go get him, beautiful. I’ll meet you outside in five minutes.” He winked.
Taking a deep breath, I waited five counts before taking another, willing my heartbeat to settle down, and then I took a step towards the stranger with a wide smile on my face.
