Page 50 of Forever Lies
“You don’t have to play dumb; I know about my father now. I know he’s in the mafia.”
“Shit, Alessia, watch your mouth.” He gaped at me as if I’d called in a bomb threat to the White House. “You don’t go spouting that shit—you’ll get yourself killed.”
“I’m not going to tell anyone. He said you were one of hissoldiers, whatever that means, so I knew that you knew. You don’t even work for a service, do you?”
“I work for your father. You are my one and only priority.”
“Do you report back to him on where I go and what I do?”
He cut his eyes over to me in answer.
All these years, while my father had acted indifferent about my life, he’d been watching over me. It was somewhat reassuring to know he had cared, but it didn’t totally make up for the feeling of betrayal. I felt like my life was a reality TV show, and everyone knew but me. I had been living a pretend life, blithefully unaware nothing around me was real.
My lifestyle had been supported by dirty money—my clothes to my education—nothing was clean. The man I’d called father all my life was a stranger. Even my life’s purpose to run our family business was now tainted. The question remained—who was I in the wake of so many lies? Could I be the same person I’d been hours ago? If I could still be that girl, did I even want to be her any longer?
CHAPTER 20
ALESSIA
I spentthe rest of the day hiding in my apartment. Luca and my father both did me the courtesy of leaving me alone. I called in sick at work, letting my staff know that I wouldn’t be in the rest of the week. I was too upset to handle life. I needed time to decide what my next move would be.
My emotions acted like a carousel with different horses rising up and down on poles. I’d left Leo in a haze of despair and hurt, but by the next morning, anger had trumped all the other emotions, taking the lead. I was furious that any semblance of control I had over my life had been taken from me, manipulated in ways I’d never even known.
So many lies.
My life had been built on them.
Midway through the morning, Maria called me. I debated not answering. I was pissed at her for being included by my father and for not telling me herself about our family, but Maria never called me, and my curiosity won out.
“Hello?” My curt greeting was lukewarm at best.
“You need to stop acting like a child.”
“Excuse me?”
“Everything Dad’s done was to keep you and Sofia safe. You find out and throw an unholy tantrum, pissed you weren’t included in the secret like it’s some game.” That was Maria, always telling it exactly as she saw it.
“I know this is no game, Maria. That’s exactly why I’m so upset. This is my life, and now I’m inextricably bound to a family of criminals without any say in the matter.”
“You could always leave.”
Her words stunned me. “Is that what you want? You want me to leave?”
“I didn’t say that—don’t put words in my mouth,” she shot back, a touch of anger in her voice. “You don’t want to be a part of this, leaving is always an option. Don’t say you don’t have a choice. If you stay, then yes, to some degree, you will always be connected, especially now that you know.”
“Why did he tell you and not us?” My question was rife with hurt, and I hated myself for showing her that vulnerability.
“You and Sof were always too good for the life. Dad wanted to give you two the chance to be free of the family.”
“And you?”
“I was a different story. Surely you remember what a terror I was as a kid. Dad knew I would get myself into trouble if he didn’t guide me and give me an outlet for all myraging emotions. Hell, I broke Billie Tomlinson’s nose when I was only ten—I wasn’t like you two. Never was, never will be.”
My heart hurt for her. Why had she been so tormented as a kid? Could I have done something differently to help? She had been the closest in age to Marco, and her discipline problems had started around the time of his death. I could only assume she had taken his loss harder than the rest of us.
“I wasn’t trying to throw a tantrum,” I attempted to explain. “You have to try to understand that my life was just turned upside down. Everything I thought I knew was wrong, and now, I’m struggling to sort it all out.”
“I get it. You’ve led a charmed life, though, and you need to understand there are all sorts of ugly out there. Just because you grew up thinking life was sunshine and rainbows, doesn’t mean it is. You may think we’re monsters, but we are far from the worst things out there. It’s time for you to accept that life has its darker side.”
