Page 121 of Dissection of a Murder
This was always going to be his reaction. Be strong.
“Iknow. I’ll never be able to trust you again.”
He slowly walks over to the dining table and pulls out one of the chairs. Taking a deep breath as he sits down, he locks his eyes onto mine and pauses. He knows I’m intimidated by him when he’s like this.
He’s always known.
“Maybe I won’t give you a divorce,” he says casually. “Perhaps I’ll just keep you around, like a pet.”
The blood in my body turns cold.
“What?”
My voice cracks. I use every ounce of strength I have to prevent tears gathering in my eyes. If he sees them, he’s won.
“I’m in no rush for a divorce.” He shrugs. “Sounds like you can’t wait to get away from me. Yes, I think it might be better to keep you around.”
“You can’t do that,” I say, shaking my head.
“Of course I can,” he says, a hint of amusement in his voice. “If I wanted to, I could make it my life’s mission to ensure you’re not happy, Leila.”
The threat lingers in the ravine between us, along with everything else that remains unsaid. I have, of course, seen this side of Julian many times before, but never dared confront it.
“This is what you did to Sienna, isn’t it?” I tell him. “That’s why she never spoke about you—she was just so relieved to get away from you. She didn’t leave you for another man—she just wanted a life without you in it.”
“Sienna was a crazy bitch.” He laughs. It’s the same line he’s peddled for years.
“And you couldn’t stand it, could you? It didn’t make sense to you, a woman daring to leave you without a reason. So, you created one and made sure everyone knew it. All those times you begged me not to cheat on you like she did. Not only was it a lie but you were doing that very thing to me. That’s top-tier hypocrisy, Julian.”
“I never told anyone she cheated on me,” he says, holding his hands up, feigning innocence.
“You heavily implied it. The truth is, you need women around so you can manipulate them to make you feel powerful.”
Audrey was right.
“I’m pretty sure everyone we know would disagree with that.”
“Yes, they would. Because outside these walls, you’re a model husband. They don’t see what I see. I used to idolize you.”
“Oh, give it a rest, would you?” he fires back. “Spare me the victim speech. You haven’t done too badly out of this. You think you’d be getting briefed in murders and high-profile cases if you weren’t my wife? The fact is, Leila, you’re an average barrister at best, and that’s being kind. You only do well because you’re attractive. Jurors likeyou, I’ll give you that. But you wouldn’t have achieved what you have without me, and you know it.”
Julian is the kind of man who chooses what comes out of his mouth very carefully, as all barristers do. He knows that saying this, right now, is going to throw me off. That’s the intended consequence.
I want to scream. I want to cry, rage, and hurl abuse about betrayal, deceit, what a massive dick he is. But I don’t.
“I need to go out,” I say quietly. “I don’t know how long I’ll be. Good luck with your speech.”
As I walk out of the door with my case papers and laptop, Chester’s voice echoes in my head.Trials aren’t won on facts, it’s all about likability.
I think this speech requires a change in direction.
59
Leila
6:26 p.m.
“Delilah?Is thatyou?”
