Page 18 of Dissection of a Murder
Now,Chesterwould do it to piss him off, but that’s not the point.
“Don’t be naive, Leila,” he says in a serious tone. “I’ve told you what she’s like.”
“I just don’t know why you care.”
“I don’t. I suppose I worry it could happen again with you.”
“That’s absolutely not going to happen,” I tell him. “You can be a right stubborn pain sometimes, but you know I’d never cheat on you. Not after what you’ve been through.”
He smiles at me, and I lean forward to kiss him. It lingers long enough to reset the mood.
“I don’t deserve you,” he whispers as his eyes meet mine, the tips of our noses touching.
“You don’t.” I smile softly. “But at least you know it.”
This trial is going to test our marriage in so many ways. The case will be career-defining, life-changing. Things are changing already.
I have to be ready for it.Wehave to be ready for it.
7
Leila
111 days before trial
One of thethings I love most about this job is getting outside the courtroom and using my platform to help young, aspiring barristers—especially women—enter the profession. I started a legal blog back when I was at law school, hoping to give a realistic account of what it was like to study at Cambridge.Chats at the Bargradually became a hit among law students, but those followers had already been successful, to a certain extent. I wanted to do more, ignite a spark in those who were surrounded by people who threw cold water on their ambitions, much like I had been at their age.
So, this evening I’m lecturing at Mountcross Academy, a local secondary school and sixth-form college on the outskirts of Durham. We’ve opened it up to students sixteen and over, in addition to the public. Advertising it on Insta to my 32,750 followers felt like a real achievement, and all 180 tickets sold out within a few days. I asked that the proceeds go to the National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children.
I walk into the modern theater-style building to rapturous applause, following a brief introduction by the head teacher. The bright white stage lights dazzle me; the only people I can see are those in the first few rows. I’ve dashed straight from work to make the 6:30 p.m.start. My hair, neatly tied into a ponytail this morning, now sags at the back of my neck, and stray hairs jump about my face. I’m also pretty sure my eyeliner isn’t where I put it ten hours ago.
“Good evening, everyone!” I speak into the microphone. “Thank you for inviting me to your wonderful school. It’s an honor to be here.”
I tell them my name is Leila Kesler by marriage, but because female barristers are always referred to by their maiden name, I am professionally known as Miss Reynolds.
We dive straight into the Q&A. This is how I like to run these talks; the floor is theirs to ask whatever they like.
“What made you want to become a criminal barrister?” inquires a girl in the front row.
It’s always the first question, and my answer is always the same.
“I actually had no clue what I wanted to do with my life until I was about sixteen,” I answer truthfully. “Around that time, I met a barrister throughmyschool and was fascinated by his job. He spoke with such passion about criminal law, running trials, cross-examining defendants. I knew then that it was what I wanted to do. Meeting that person changed my life.”
“I love that, Leila!” Rachel, our host and head teacher, says into the microphone. “Never underestimate how influential the right person can be. OK, next question…”
She moves to a girl in the second row.
“Is it realistic for people like us, who don’t go to a private school or come from wealthy backgrounds, to get into criminal law? My parents say I’ve got my head in the clouds.”
Rage starts to gather in my body.
Nothing makes me angrier than a parent dampening a child’s desire to do well for themselves.
“Fuck that,” I say calmly into the microphone. It has the intendedeffect. Gasps and giggles rebound around the room. “You’re all smart, driven, intelligent young people. You can do anything you want. Prove them wrong.
“I went to a school just like this one, and I had nobody in my corner, either. You’ll be told it’s not for you, that it’s impossible, you’re wasting your time. Ignore them. You need to be your own champion. That’s OK. I believe in you. I believe in all of you.”
“Leila, off the back of that, do you think you’ve been disadvantaged in any way because of your working-class roots?” Rachel asks.
