Page 25 of Unknowingly Adopting the Alpha
“In the diner,” he continued, still holding the cage like Daisy was grounding him somehow. “I realized that me being your friend is hurting you.”
Before I could deny that, he kept going. “And then there’s Darius.” If possible, his eyes turned sadder at the mention of my best friend. “I know we were only supposed to be friends. I was okay with that, or at least I thought so. But seeing the way you looked at Darius?” He shook his head, a sad smile forced upon his lips. “I can’t put my heart through that.”
“I’m not interested in Darius,” I hurried to say, needing him to know I wasn’t ever going to be with anyone else. I couldn’t blurt out that he was my fated now. It would seem like I was making shit up on the spot. Plus he might think I only chose him because hewasmy fated and not because I wantedhim.
“The way you looked at him,” he whispered, looking down at his kitchen floor. “I just need a break. That’s all I’m asking.”
“Cass,” I tried, but he shook his head.
“I have to get Daisy used to the place and I would appreciate it if you gave me the privacy to do that. I’m not saying we can’t be friends anymore, but sitting in that diner… I just realized I’m bringing more trouble your way than I’m worth. Adding in Darius…” He stepped further back. “I just can’t right now.”
“Please,” I begged, but he’d already turned his back on me.
Chapter Fourteen
Cassian
The sound of the front door closing was what finally broke the dam. Damn, Daisy didn’t deserve such a sad first day here.
Letting her out slowly, she moved outside her cage, bowing her back like she feared the opening would crush her. She sniffed around while I left her to it, leaving the carrier open in case she needed the safety of it. I didn’t want her to escape, so I closed the living room door, giving her access to the kitchen and living room only. Then I walked out to my car to grab everything I’d bought for her. Jeremy was long gone. Even though I’d wanted him to leave, I still felt like my insides were screaming because of it.
Why did Jeremy affect me so much? Why did I evenneedhim? Sure, we’d had fun together, and he was easy to talk to. But why did it seem like he was everything to me? There had to be some kind of wolf powers at play, right?
Shaking the thought away, I placed the cat tree box down in the hallway, then went back outside for the rest. Once I’d emptied out my car completely, I decided to build the cat tree.A beeping sound interrupted my amazing building skills, and I went in search of the sound.
“What the?”
My brand-new washer and dryer were installed and looking all shiny and perfect in my mudroom. Had Jeremy done that? I felt both happy and sad at the thought. I’d basically thrown him out, and here he’d been, installing my new machines and even washing one load.
No. His leaving was for the best. My feelings were all over the place and I knew what I’d seen between Darius and him. I was no good for the pack Alpha, and Jeremy would realize that soon enough.
Taking out the washing, I added it to the dryer and turned it on, then promptly filled the washer again with some of my newly bought linens.
“Shoot!” I exclaimed, then hurried back to Daisy. I’d completely forgotten the litterbox!
With the litterbox now set up and filled with litter, I breathed easier knowing my precious Daisy would have a place to go pee. I felt like the worst cat dad, bringing her to this dump of a home while I kept wiping away silent tears.
This couldn’t be normal. Crying over a guy I’d known for days seemed ridiculous! But here I was, sobbing away as I moved my furniture around. The carpet guy was coming in the morning, and I wanted it to be done as fast as possible. That meant I had to move things out of the way. He’d start with the second floor, so I carefully carried what I could out of the rooms and let Daisy roam freely downstairs.
Thinking of Jeremy while I tried very hard not to, seemed to be what I would spend the rest of the night doing. I literally couldn’t stop it. Maybe I should see a therapist or something. This unhealthy obsession with a guy I barely knew had taken over all my thoughts and I couldn’t escape him. Why had it mattered somuch if Jeremy was into Darius? I wasn’t in love with Jeremy. I couldn’t possibly be already, yet I felt like he was mine somehow.
This, this right here, was the reason he had to leave. I wasn’t good for him. This wasn’t good for me either. I felt too out of control, too unsettled when he wasn’t with me. I had to just rip the bandage off and hope the hold he had on me would lessen over time.
A soft meow reached me. My poor Daisy was likely already feeling neglected and hungry. I mentally slapped myself and hurried to fill her new bowl with the cat food.
“I’m so sorry, Daisy,” I apologized, hoping she wouldn’t use this against me. I really needed her company tonight. I wasn’t looking forward to going to bed alone. Just the thought…
A sob escaped me yet again and I had to slap myself, hard, too hard.Owww… But damn, I needed to get back to the Cass I was before meeting Jeremy.
Forcing a smile, I gently stroked Daisy who ate happily at her new food. I would be okay.
I had to be.
That had been the worst night of my life.
After tossing and turning for over an hour, Daisy had left my bedroom. She was already tired of my shit it seemed. When sleepfinally claimed me, I’d dreamt of Red, then of Jeremy, like my brain somehow had to show me I missed both versions of him. I hadn’t just told Jeremy to leave yesterday, I’d told Red…MyRed. And that was what I’d seen in my dream turned nightmare, the look of sadness in Red’s eyes as I’d told him to leave my house, leaving him out in the thundering rain. Because, of course, my nightmare had to make it even worse.
Groaning, I sat up and decided a shower would be the best start to this horrible day. That’s when I remembered Jeremy had added the second base coat. It was another thing he’d done yesterday. I was such an idiot.
