Page 106 of Fiery Little Thing
“Youwhat?” His eyes widen with each revelation. With the last confession, they almost pop out of his head, and his skin turns bright crimson.
Guess he’s fucking awake now.
“No questions,” I hiss, poking him in the center of his chest.“I almost died trying to get here. I saw a fucking coyote—”
The look on his face is somewhere between amused and mortified. “There are no coyotes around here. But—”
“Fine. I saw a bear—I don’t fucking know.” I can feel myself start to hyperventilate. “I was out of my mind. Covered in blood. Inagony.But I was like, ‘You know what? It’s fine, because Kohen will be waiting for me.’ And,God, I missed you so fucking much.”
Kohen steps closer, grasping my throat. “I’m sorry. I’m here now,” he says, voice low and soothing.
I grip onto his shirt, not wanting to let him go. “I’ve been worried sick—I’ve never worried this much before.” Tears bead along my eyelashes. "I wasn’t sure if you were okay or needed help. But then you called meonceafter six days. I thought you could have died, Kohen. I thought my grandfather got to you, or your brother went crazy. I thought if you weren’t dead, you were washing your hands clean of me.”
“Blaze,” he says sternly. “I’m back.”
“Nine fucking days,” I whisper. A single tear burns a path down my cheek. “I thought you were gone, Kohen. I thought you left. I don’t want to lose you.”
“Blaze.”
“I thought your promises were as empty as my mother’s and that you were just as cruel as my grandfather. There wasn’t a single word from you, and I hated you for it, and I hated myself for trusting you. Everyone realizes I’m a piece of shit eventually, and I kept thinking it was only logical that you came to the same conclusion.” I can’t stop myself from talking or calm by breathing. “And I feel so selfish because I never stopped to think that you might be suffering more than me. What happened? Are you okay? I need to know you’re alright, Kohen.”
When he cups my face in both his hands, I let him. “Blaze. I’d leave everything behind just to be with you. I have, and I’d do it again. I loved you when we were kids. I loved you when you framed me. I loved you nine days ago. And I love you now. Nothing is going to change that. As long as you’re there, I will always be alright.”
I love you.
The three words choke me. Kohen’s made me feel cared for and cherished, like I’m the only girl in his world. In reality, it all translates to one simple thing and I never understood what it was: he made me feel loved. It’s on the tip of my tongue to say it back because I want to make him feel the exact same way I do, like he’s loved. But the words won’t come out.
It feels undeserving coming out of my mouth, as if I haven’t earned the honor of loving him when I still haven’t earned any of his attention. Like there’s so much more than me that he deserves, and… I can’t say it to him when I can’t say it to myself. How could he love me when I’m me?
I know he means the words with every fiber of his being; he’s proven it more times than I can count. But I don’t feel worthy ofreceiving it.
Instead of saying it back, I clear my throat and wipe away the tears as I wrap my fingers around his wrist. “What do you mean you left everything behind? I want to know everything that happened.”
The disappointment in his eyes guts me deep, and I look away so I don’t have to relive the moment I let him down. “Let me take a look at your hand first.”
I shake my head. “Later. Tell me first.”
Kohen drops his head with a defeated sigh, running his fingers through his hair. “I couldn’t get the money. The funds could be given to me after high school, only at my father’s discretion. He said he’d only give it to me if I continued living under his wing, work at his company, study what he wants me to study, and move back in with him every summer. I spent the past nine days trying to figure out a way to get my trust fund—or any funds. My father still refused.”
I frown, reaching up to hold his face with my good hand. He leans into my touch and closes his eyes as if he can finally rest. “It’s okay. We can do without it.”
Kohen’s trust fund was part of his grand plan, the thing that’s meant to set him—us—up for the future. Thanks to all the scholarships he’s received, the full ride through college will help, but the money would be the buffer that would set us up in the meantime. It’s one of his manyfuck yousto his father.
I dip forward, curling my body around him in the type of hug Hallmark wouldn’t be able to replicate. His arms wrap around my waist, and he hauls me up against him as his lips meet mine in the type of kiss that makes me forget everything that happened over the past few days. Every single worry I had disappears with the touch of his lips, and it’s as if here, in our little bubble, nothing could ever gowrong.
My legs curve around him, kissing him harder like my life depends on it, because I want him to know that even though I couldn’t say the words, I wouldn’t trade him for the world. “I missed you,” I say as he moves into the room, kicking the door shut behind him.
“That doesn’t begin to describe how I’ve been feeling this past week.” His chest rumbles against mine, and I hug him tighter, breathing in his scent.
“If you had left me, I would have hunted you down and killed you with my bare hands,” I whisper against his neck.
His sharp exhale ruffles through my hair as he lowers us down onto the bed, never once breaking us apart. “That’s a good way to go in my books.”
Minutes roll by in silence with nothing but our heavy breaths and the fucking infomercial to fill the small space between our bodies. Patchouli and mint shroud me in its warm embrace, and I run my fingers through his hair—it’s longer than he’s ever had it before. My eyes drift shut as the hollowness in my heart fills with each breath I take. I’m not alone, and I never will be again. No trust fund can put a price on that. I want Kohen whatever way he comes.
Reluctantly, I pull away and break the silence first. Hazel eyes meet mine, creased with concern and heavy-lidded with fatigue. They don’t soften nearly as much as I’d like when I press a kiss to his nose.
“What about the plan with Kiervan?” I ask carefully, running my fingers up and down his back so he knows that with or without the money, I’ll still be here for him.
