Page 62 of Sparktopia
It’s completely different. Because he is betraying me. I am in distress, I am in danger, and he refuses to step in and stop it.
He didn’t eventry.
All this time I imagined Finn Scott was an honorable, intelligent, capable man. And I believed him when he said he loved me.
How could he love me when he didn’t come up with a single plan?
He did promise revenge. And it sounded so genuine at the time. It touched me, it did.
But there was no brainstorming with his friends to concoct a harebrained save-the-girl scheme. Even if it would’ve never worked, a token gesture along that line would’ve been a tiny bit comforting. I would, at the very least, feel… valued? I guess?
I don’t like feeling this way. I had never thought of myself as small, and petty, and selfish.
But I think I am.
I must be.
Because this is the truth.
This is how I feel.
And I will never forgive Finn Scott for what he is about to do.
The next thing I know it’s eleven-thirty, the dance is over, and it’s time to go outside and walk over to the tower stage. We hit the chilled air and suddenly the bells are there, ringing, and ringing, and ringing—like they have been all day. But somehow, I had put them out of my mind. Pushed them into the background. Probably because they’ve been tolling almost constantly for two days and now it’s just… background noise.
But the clanging is suddenly too much. And I think it is the sound of these bells that is making me shake. The low, booming peal of the god’s call echoes through the air like a disturbance.
My mind is whirring and I feel…less than. If that makes any sense. Less than Haryet. Less than Brooke, and Piper, and Lucy, and both of the Mabels, and Marlowe. And especially less than Imogen, who was the first of us.
I’m an embarrassment, that’s what I am. And my whole life suddenly feels pointless and shallow. Like I walked through it as a shadow of what I could’ve been.
If only I’d tried harder or…something.
Then Gemna is beside me, taking my hand. And Finn is letting go, hugging me. Kissing me. Meaningless words spilling out of his mouth and into mine.
“I love you.” He just keeps saying this as we kiss. “I love you, Clara. I will love you forever.”
But it’s a lie. It’s nothing but a fucking lie. Already Haryet is a distant memory to the people of Tau City. Hell, they probably haven’t thought about Imogen in years. Probably don’t even remember the name of the Maiden who was sent in twenty years ago.
I know I don’t.
Then Finn is all the way across the stage, looking up at the tower. So I look up too and find that we are one minute to midnight.
One minute. That’s all I have left.
The moment this thought ends, the god’s bellsstopand the clocktower bell starts chiming the final countdown.
I watch as the massive black doors begin to open and before I can even make a decision, my feet are walking forward, not under my control.
I’m being drawn in! Like there is a powerful magnet in there and I am nothing but iron.
Which is just funny. Because iron is strong, but I am weak.
And just as I think that, extreme heat fills my fingertips, floods my hands, flows up my arms and over my shoulders, and suddenly my entire body is aglow with cyan-blue spark.
I look over my shoulder, panic building inside me like an inferno. “Finn!” I call, desperate to beg one more time to be saved. “Finn!”
He looks at me, his face unreadable, and for a moment, I think he changes his mind. I think… I think he’s leaning forward. Yes! He’s coming! He’s going to save me!
