Page 520 of Bad Prince

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I push through the doors of the athletic complex with my sunglasses on even though I’m indoors, because dignity is a fragile thing and mine is currently hanging by a thread made of lip gloss and spite.

The first thing I notice is how everyone is trying not to look at me.

Which is worse than if they just did.

Girls from soccer glance and then glance away too fast.

A student manager from baseball gives me that painfully sympathetic little half-smile people reserve for girls who got dumped by boys with publicists in their blood.

Two rowers pause their conversation when I pass and immediately start pretending they were definitely discussing electrolytes and not my humiliation.

I keep walking.

Head high.

Back straight.

Texas-sized poise.

Because if I let one single person smell blood in the water, I will have to start committing felonies before lunch.

My phone buzzes again.

Another text from a friend back home.

Babe are you okay??

followed by three screenshots and a lot of unnecessary exclamation points.

I don’t answer.

I don’t answer anybody.

Because I am fine.

Not fine fine.

But functional.

Mascara intact.

Still capable of deadlifting more than half the men around me.

That counts.

I make it to the locker room, toss my bag into a cubby, and stare at my reflection in the mirror over the sinks.

Hair up.

Skin clear.

Lashes on.

Game face.

There is no visible evidence that the boy I almost had— just put another girl on a private plane and took her to rewrite their tragic origin story like some East Coast version of a romance novel.

You would never know by looking at me that my chest has felt like a cracked windshield all morning.