Page 33 of In Her Own Way
The three of them bantered back and forth a bit, and Victoria was glad she’d put up a post that got lively, fun responses. They were both fun and intelligent women. Bernadette had been intelligent, too. She groaned. That rabbit hole kept presenting itself. Okay, she had to do something else right now. She excused herself from the conversation. Patrolling would take her mind off her shit that kept creeping back up.
She stepped outside the office, but dove right back in. The wind had kicked up, making it feel colder than it was. She found Erin’s stash of gloves in a desk drawer and even found a scarf to go with them. Most of her own winter gear was safely stored in a box in one of Rowena’s spare bedrooms. She stepped outside again and was assaulted by a wind gust that almost knocked her over. It was only mid-October, what the hell?
She didn’t skimp through her rounds, but she didn’t dawdle, either. All seemed well and quiet. Although she was working the next night, she made appointments to look at two apartment complexes in the afternoon. Hopefully, something would pan out; she was eager not only to unburden her cousin but also to get on with her life. The apartments she’d already seen were either seriously lacking or too expensive for her now-meager income. She was not going to get a roommate. No fucking way.
Back in the office, she found some cleaning supplies and tidied up the office and small bathroom, trying to make use of the time. She had nervous energy for some reason. Maybe a cup of tea would help.
“Thank you, Erin,” she said, thanking her cousin for stocking teas, coffee, and hot chocolate in the security office.
She put her feet up on the desk, leaned back, and had a quickish power nap. The kind she’d learned to take in her Army Reserve days. When she woke, she had managed to burn enough time that there were now only a couple more hours to go in her shift. She opened theKinksapp again and was pleased to seethat a few other members, lesbo_submisso, Curl_My_Toes, and Knees Now, had joined in the fun and added a few more pickup lines to the post. Juicy_Babe and Rachels_Toy had continued to banter after Victoria left. It seemed like those two had a nice friendship going. Friendship onKinks. Huh. Victoria had never thought of it that way, beyond her local Denton Heights friends.
For some reason, Victoria felt good. Maybe because she’d brought some fun to theKinksgroup. The responses to her question about contracts had garnered mixed responses, so Victoria concluded what she’d already known. Contracts work for some and not for others. Rachels_Toy said quite seriously that her contract was called a marriage license. Interesting. Victoria had never thought about a marriage license as a contract before. She supposed it was. It was certainly more than a simple piece of paper showing the world two people’s commitment to each other. Marriage was kind of like a business arrangement, wasn’t it? With entwined finances and everything. Nevertheless, Victoria was going to remain a non-contract person, and for some reason, she was glad to see that Juicy_Babe wasn’t a fan of contracts, either.
Marriage and contracts got Victoria thinking about something else. She put up another post. No one would be awake at four a.m., so she could put up the post and figuratively run.
Topic:Casual sex. One-night stands.
Question:Can one-night stands sustain you?
She was just about to click out of the group space and start another round of bird jokes with Madison when her message light lit up. She had nothing better to do, so she opened it.
Juicy_Babe:Hope it was okay to DM you. I’m up late, I know (eastern time zone). I’m glad you joined the group. You’ve brought new life to it. You’revery thoughtful and kind to everyone. And your questions are making me (and everyone else) think!
Juicy_Babe:I may find a way to phrase this in your public post, but I wanted to say this to you directly because I think you’re searching. I may be waaaay off base, but I recognize a kindred spirit in that regard. One of the themes in Frankenstein is loneliness for both the (not so) good doctor and his created creature. Their absence of love, family, and community ties ruins them both. I’ve recently moved. New job, new apartment, new town. No friends here, and I’m searching for the comfort of these things. Family is two states away (and that’s kind of okay. LOL).
Juicy_Babe:Let me know if communicating directly like this is okay or NOT okay. I’m kind of sleep-deprived at the moment and probably not thinking clearly. And…if it IS okay, do you require honorifics? I’m going back to bed now. I’ll read your response in the morning (if you do respond). Good night, DV. Or is it DC now?
“Huh,” Victoria said. “That was brave, poor thing. She’s lonely.” She sat breathing for a while, digesting Juicy_Babe’s direct messages. “I’m lonely, too.” Tears burned her eyes, but she shook them off.
She would answer the messages, but she needed time to digest them first.
Chapter 10
Jessica
Late Saturday morning, Jessica woke up groggy and not well-rested at all. The sun was streaming into her bedroom through the gap in the curtain. A sense of dread overcame her, but she didn’t know why.
“Misty?” Oh, she was fine. The cat stretched and then jumped down, chirping her way out of the room, obviously wanting breakfast.
The instant Jessica’s feet hit the floor, she remembered. “Oh, fuck. What the fuck did I do?” She reached for her phone on the bedside stand. “Oh, no no no no no.” Without her glasses, she couldn’t see the stupid screen. She put them on and blinked the sleepiness from them. Once in theKinksapp, she saw that she had three messages.
Her heart thumped in her chest. “I’m such an ass. So impulsive. I direct-messaged her. She probably reminded me of the many boundaries I had crossed and left the group. Or, more likely, she was polite and let me down gently. “I can’t look.” She clicked her phone off and headed for the bathroom. She needed to do her Saturday morning routine, which included both coffee and feeding the queen. Misty’s breakfast was several hours overdue, such a poor, abused little thing.
Once Jessica was adequately caffeinated and Misty adequately fed, Jessica sat at her desk in the living room. It was the place she paid bills and graded papers, and apparently, today it was where she faced the music for being way too forward with someone.
“I’m going in, Misty,” Jessica said to the calico without looking at her.
Jessica reopened her phone, opened theKinksapp, and hovered her finger over the message icon. Chickening out, she said to Misty, “I lied. I’mnotgoing in.”
Instead, she found the post about one-night stands and casual sex. Wow, Jessica most certainly had been there, done that. Still doing it, right? Every time she went to Dominique’s, she scoured the common rooms for Dommes willing to play. Ever since she’d thought the pasture was greener on the other side and broken up with Mistress Marta, she’d discovered that, no, it really hadn’t been greener. Casual sex at the dungeon with strangers or repeat partners like Cazadora Catalina or online with Maistresse Marguerite and others hadn’t done much to sustain her. Sustain…was that the word Daddy Vic used?
A quick look at the post confirmed that, yes, sustain was the word she’d used.
Topic:Casual sex. One-night stands.
Question:Can one-night stands sustain you?
Jessica’s response was short.
