Page 65 of Redemption
I grew up with every material thing a child could possibly want, as well as plenty of love, but one thing I have never experienced is a true family meal.
Today, it isn’t only my brother’s, mother’s, and father’s lives that have changed irrevocably, but also mine. An entire life was denied to my brother through the winds of fate, but this simple pleasure of a family dinner was denied to me.
Seeing my mother and father in the same place at the same time … I truly never knew if that would ever happen. And today, it has.
While it may seem that this homecoming and reunion are not about me, I am equally affected and blessed.
My mother has said it over and over again—we have been blessed with a miracle. I feel it acutely.
Watching my family take their seats at a table together—my father, mother, brother, sister-in-law, and niece—I am overwhelmed with the sight and the rush of emotions that crash through me like a rogue wave.
I am beyond blessed. I am touched by God’s favor.
I feel no hunger as I watch the moment unfold before me like I’m watching a movie of someone else’s life. It is so surreal; it feels like it’s not even happening to me.
Something as simple as watching my mother offering my father a platter of cured meats and cheeses shouldn’t feel like I’m seeing another miracle happen, but it does.
I thought I was prepared for this—for what this would mean to me and my family—but I was wrong. This is so much more than anything I could have imagined or for which I could have prepared myself.
The lack of awkwardness between my parents is a blessing I did not expect. One would think after over forty years apart, they would not know how to be around one another, but it feels like they’ve been together this entire time.
It makes absolutely no sense, but they’ve settled back into a pattern they must have created long ago.
My father lifts another platter to offer my mother her favorite grapes. He never forgot her favorite grapes. My heart clenches, and the realization nearly brings me to tears.
How do I deserve so much? How can my life be so blessed?
They are questions I’ve asked over and over throughout the years, and I’ve never received any answers. But I accept it for what it is. Somehow, I must deserve this. Somehow, I must be worthy of these great gifts that I have been given.
Nothing and no one could compare with the heart-expanding joy I feel that keeps tears perched on my lashes, ready to fall at any second.
My father seems to have softened and gentled in an instant. The hard, sharp edges that were his trademark seem to have disappeared. It’s astonishing to witness his love-filled gaze as he watches his granddaughter’s tiny hands artlessly smear strawberries on her sweet face.
It’s like a completely new universe has opened up before me. A new world. A new life. And it is full of new possibilities and potentialities.
I knew that bringing my brother here would change everything, but even I, with what I believed was my expanded awareness, did not understand the magnitude of change I was helping to unleash.
Much-needed change.
If I am honest—and that is one thing I require of myself always—I did not realize how stagnant and subdued life had become before now.
My father’s health has been on the forefront of my mind for years. I did not know if he would survive to see this day that I hoped would eventually come to fruition. And even if he did survive, I wasn’t sure he would be able to accept it or feel joy after so many years spent drowning in bitterness and regret.
But in everything, I am a student. And today, I see that what I believed possible was only a small fraction of what life has shown to be the truth.
Words cannot describe what it is like to experience this. It is ineffable. I simply watch and witness the beauty taking place at the table before me. Keira cutting up small bites of food for Aurora. Lachlan—or Luca, as he shall always be to me—watching them solicitously, as if waiting for any opportunity to assist. Catching the glances of my mother and father across the table, as they sneak peeks at each other after all these years apart. For years, I have wondered how their reunion would go. I have imagined it so many different ways. Tempestuous, explosive, loud … but never this. I was totally and completely wrong.
I never expected this peace. This love. This … completeness of our family.
Now, more than ever, I am grateful my brother has sired an heir. Not for the future of the family line or to maintain our holdings, but because I believe her innocence has affected us all. My father was brought to his knees. My mother retained her intrinsic sweetness.
As Mama has said and will no doubt continue to say over and over, it is a miracle. And I, for one, simply count myself lucky to witness it.
And even luckier to watch the healing of my family begin.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Lachlan
