Page 35 of House of Scarlett
New York was another world. Another universe.
Men walked the sidewalks in their sleek black suits, carrying briefcases, knowing exactly where they were going and what they were about. I didn’t even own a suitcase, let alone a briefcase, but I promised myself that someday, I’d walk the city and know exactly where I was going. I wouldn’t stare in wonder and awe, like a boy fresh from the trailer park. I would be comfortable and confident in my new home, and everyone would know my name.Someday.
It’s funny how your dreams change as you grow up. I do walk the city, because I love it even more than that very first day, and I know exactly where I’m going, but I don’t wear suits or carry a briefcase. I don’t care if anyone knows my name either. I stopped worrying about impressing people years ago ... except I do want to impressher.
But I don’t know how.
This woman has never once worried about money in her life, and I can’t breathe easy without knowing where every penny of mine is.
And two weeks ago, before I fucked up worse than I’ve ever fucked up before, she told me she wanted to try things for real with me.
With me.She doesn’t even know me yet.
Will she want me after she does?
That’s a question I refuse to think much about, because it’ll stop me where I stand. If once she sees everything I bring to the table, she decides it’s not enough, then that’s my penance for how I treated her. I made peace with it after I walked my ass back to the club this morning from the hospital.
Whatever happens next ... all I can do is let fate decide.
I glance over at Scarlett, and her blond hair is pulled into a messy bun at the nape of her neck. She’s staring straight ahead at the back of the black leather seat in front of her, her posture stiff as hell. Immediately, I wonder if she’s in pain.
“You okay?”
She jerks her head to the side to look at me.
“Are you in pain? You look uncomfortable.”
Scarlett presses both lips together and makes an awkward expression.
“What’s wrong?” I lean forward in my seat, ready to jump into action at her command.
“I puked all over the toilet in my bathroom, and I don’t know if anyone cleaned it. All I can think about is how embarrassing that’s going to be if you see my bathroom with a pukey toilet.”
My posture relaxes as the words process in my brain. Laughter builds in my chest. “That’s what you’re worrying about right now? A dirty toilet?”
She nods, and I can’t help it. A chuckle escapes from my lips, filling the cabin of the SUV.
“Fuck that. I’ve seen bathrooms and urinals a priest couldn’t save. I was worried you were in excruciating pain, and you’re worried about me seeing some barf you didn’t flush?”
“Oh God, don’t say it like that. It sounds so gross, and yet petty.” A smile curls her lips, and I’m thankful the awkward expression and tension disappears.
I reach out and snag her hand, tangling her fingers with mine. “I promise I won’t judge. I’ll even clean it for you. Seems fair to me.”
Her eyes go wide and her lower lip drops with her jaw. “What? No. Not a chance. I’ll clean up my own vomit, thank you very much.”
“You can argue with me, ladybug, but you won’t win. I swear, I’m the most stubborn person you’ll ever meet.”
Her fingers grip mine just tight enough to let me know she doesn’t want me to let her go, and a warm feeling spreads in my chest.
“I don’t know, cowboy. I’m pretty stubborn too.”
I jerk my head back. “Cowboy?”
“I was trying out a nickname. You need one too.” Her cheeks flush red, and it’s cute as fucking hell. “I’ll scratch cowboy off the list then.”
“Keep trying, ladybug. I have faith you’ll find one.”
Twenty
