Chapter 28
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The pity party in my rental car is reaching pathetic levels as I pull back into the gravel drive of Holly’s gran’s house and drop my forehead against the steering wheel.
“What now?” I whisper to absolutely no one.
At least at home, I could walk across the hall and be treated to unsolicited advice from Frau Frances. Even though the woman outed me to the association board, I actually miss her.
Before I can talk myself out of it, I grab my phone, pull up her contact information, and call.
“Frances residence.”
Recognizing the voice of Irene, one of her caretakers, I say, “This is Banner Regent. I could feel Myrna missing me all the way from New York.”
“Ms. Regent, it’s good to hear from you. Let me see if Mrs. Frances is available to speak with you.”
I roll my eyes. “We both know she’s going to say no, even though she wants to say yes. Tell her it’s Smith College wanting to discuss naming a building after her.”
A few beats of silence pass before Irene replies. “I’m going to tell her you lied to me, you know.”
A chuckle rises up from my chest, already lightening my mood. “Perfect.”
“Hold, please.”
I wait sixty seconds before Myrna’s familiar raspy voice comes through.
“I’m not giving you any more damn money, if that’s what you’re asking.”
My lips stretch in a smile. “Color me shocked, Myrna. And here I thought you were going to give me all your millions after I was evicted.”
“Who is this? Because you sound like that ungrateful girl who used to live across the hall from me.”
“The one and only. You know you’ve missed me. Come on ... you can admit it.”
“Please tell me you’re not homeless and hooking on the street.”
That pulls a full-blown laugh from me. “I’m really not. I’m in Kentucky, trying on the small-town life.” That should knock her back in her rocking chair. I didn’t tell Frau Frances where I was going before I left New York, because I was still pissed at her for tattling on me to the board.
“Kentucky?” The shock in her voice comes through loud and clear. “Why in God’s name would you go there?”
“I needed a cheap place to live so I don’t end up homeless and hooking,” I say, throwing her words back at her.
“Do they even fluorinate their water? It can’t be remotely civilized. You’ll probably get eaten by some strange animal.”
I’m not sure Myrna has left New York in twenty years, so her priceless reaction is just the comic relief I needed.
“So far the only thing that’s been eaten is my—”
She cuts me off before I can finish. “Gah! Still haven’t learned to keep your legs closed, you—”
Laughter bursts from my lips, drowning out whatever she says next, which is probably for the best. I wipe the tears from my eyes with the sides of my fingers so I don’t smear my eyeliner.
“Thank you, Myrna, for giving me exactly what I needed. You don’t have to admit it, but I know you miss me.”
She harrumphs, and it’s almost as good through the phone as in person. “If I did miss you, it’s only because the couple who moved in across the hall have a fondness for curry, and I’m choking to death on air freshener to get rid of the smell. If I die from this, I’m blaming you.”
Surprisingly, I don’t actually want to argue that it’s her own fault she’s stuck with the scent of curry.