Page 84 of Friends That Heal Us
I pivot myself and the cart around and go toward another aisle, hoping she didn’t see me but already knowing she did.I know eventually I’m going to have to file for divorce papers because I know damn well she’s not going to.
I grab an ingredient off the shelf, thinking I’m in the clear, when I hear, “Ezra.”
My face tightens in pain from the sound of her voice. I stand in silence watching her step closer towards me.
“How are you?”
How am I? It’s shocking she doesn’t go straight to her victim mentality.
“Good,” I answer, and walk past her.
Her breath catches and she reaches out her hand to stop me. “Ez.”
I turn around and look at her hand on my arm and then back up to her. She looks mostly sober. Her eyes look clearer, but there is still something there—a hint of leftovers still lingering on her. Leftovers that I can’t quite put my finger on. Alcohol? Or being used by the man she spread her legs for?
“Can we talk?”
“What do you have to say now?”
She blinks back like she doesn’t even know what to say because she’s never seen me give her the cold shoulder. I’ve always put her above me, and that’s where I went wrong. Even though it’s so hard to admit it, I gave her the ability to walk all over me. I’m part of the reason for that, so I can’t put all the blame on her. But I broke that the moment I found out she slept with Zayn. It shocked me when she took the initiative to move out, but I think she didn’t know how to handle the new me. So, instead, she left.
I walk away again.
“Wait.” She grabs onto me once more. “I miss you.”
I stare back at her with a blank face. I honestly have no words about what to say to her. There is nothing left to be said. There was a time when I would say something back, but now? It’s likeeverything has dried up for her. All that is left is…nothing. I don’t feel anything.
“Don’t you miss me?”
“No.”
Her mouth parts. “Come on, it’s me, your wife.”
“You may be my wife on paper, but emotionally and physically you’re not.”
“Ezra.” Her voice is tight and her chin is quivering with the effort not to cry. “You don’t mean that.”
“No, I do.”
“What do I have to do to make this right?”
My face twists into a what-the-fuck look. “Nothing. There will never be an us again.”
“If it’s because you slept with Violet, I understand. I forgive you,” she spits out fast as I step away from her. “We can move forward from this and start over.”
I turn around. “Rya, what don’t you get? You’re a selfish human being, and that’s putting it nicely. We’re done. We should have been done a long time ago, but I put our friendship above my happiness. All for what? For you to go spread your legs for someone who probably never intended on leaving his wife for you. I gave you everything, and you wasted it. I’m done wasting my time on you.”
“This is because of Violet, huh?”
My jaw tightens. “Keep her name out of your mouth.”
Her head jerks back.
“You know damn well she didn’t deserve any of this. She was your best friend. She loved you like a sister. But once again you only thought about yourself. You’re still only thinking about yourself. And what did you think, you and Zayn were going to ride off into the sunset together?” I scoff, shaking my head. I step in closer to her. “And did you really think we wouldn’t have found out that you lied to us all those years ago?”
She swallows hard, eyes darting to the floor. “What do you mean?”
“You knew she liked me, but instead of letting her be happy, you had to get what she wanted. Why is it so hard for you to let someone else be happy? You walk all over everyone’s happiness as if it makes you happy seeing others not get what they want.”
