Page 33 of Friends That Heal Us
Not anymore.
Goodbye baggage.
Hours later, I have five more bags completely full, and I’m not sure where I’m going to put them since the outside garbage can is almost full. I threw away our old pictures, wedding stuff, and stuff he’s bought me.That’s a lot of years of my life, I think to myself as I look at the bags.
The sound of the door shutting startles me, making goosebumps run down my body because I know who this must be. I close my eyes tightly, waiting for the uninvited anger to spring back.
“Vi.” I can hear footsteps getting closer to the stairway until the steps sound softer as his feet hit the carpeted stairs.
“There you are,” he says to my back as I stand in my closet.
I wish I could keep my back towards him, but I’ve read and watched enough crime to know that isn’t a good idea. I turn around and stare back at the man I used to know. The scent of oil doesn’t hit my nostrils like it normally does. He showered before he came. For what? Does he think his smell will make me forgive him? The only scent I can smell on him is disgust.
It’s crazy what someone’s actions can make you feel about them. Or in this case, smell. How do you explain the scent of disgust? You can’t, but I swear the smell lingers in the air between us. I stare back at him trying to find the man I used to love. My best friend I used to love. But I can’t find him. He looks and talks the same. But he’s not the same. It’s a weird feeling to stand here facing the man you vowed the rest of your life to. The man you thought you knew and now know nothing about him at all. All these years thrown away in a matter of months. How can someone waste all those years away? Just like that? Like I was nothing. Like none of this mattered.
I shift my sight behind him, looking at his clothes that still hang in the closet, breaking our eye contact. “Did you bring boxes or bags to pack your stuff?” I ask.
The corners of his lips turn down slightly as he steps closer to me. My body jerks back quickly as if he has an axe in his hand about to whack me.
His brows knit together. “Vi. It’s just me.”
I’m even shocked at the sudden movement that came out of my body so naturally. My body doesn’t like him anymore. “Did you expect me to go running into your arms or something?”
“No, but I didn’t expect that.”
“I don’t know how you couldn’t have expected it when you ruined everything between us,” I snap, crossing my arms as I stand tall.
He nods his head, shifting his gaze to the ground. “Can we talk?”
“Yeah. We can. Do you want to get the divorce papers or should I?” I ask, my jaw tight.
“What?” His voice rises and his eyes go wide, clearly shocked by my question. “Are you being serious?”
“Dead serious.”
“We need to talk about this,” he mumbles, avoiding my gaze.
“What is there to talk about?”
The room hangs heavy with silence as I’m left standing here staring at a man who can’t even find the words to his own mistakes. I can’t believe it, but then again, I shouldn’t be so shocked at this point.
“Exactly. You have nothing to say because even you know how badly you fucked up. Don’t make this harder than it should be. Just pack your stuff and get out,” I snap, walking right past him, making sure my shoulder doesn’t swipe his.
He follows behind me. “We can do couples therapy…” he trails off. “Or counseling. Whatever the hell it’s called.”
I whip myself around, my brows furrowed. “No.”
His body jerks as he suddenly stops before running into me.
“I don’t want to be with you. You disgust me.”
“We’re best friends. I know you better than anyone else,” he says, swallowing the lump in his throat as if he doesn’t even believe it himself.
“What does that matter? The Zayn I know—my best friend, my childhood friend—wouldn’t go behind my back and fuck someone else. I don’t know who you are anymore, and I don’t know when things changed with you. But you can’t go around treating people like shit and then expecting them to forgive you just like that. You even treated Ezra like shit.” My body shakes as the anger rises in me.
His brows furrow hard at our best friend’s name. “What does he have to do with this?”
“Everything! You slept with your best friend’s wife. How can you even ask such a dumb question?” My chest heaves with anger.
