Page 33 of These Godly Lies
Anna doesn’t understand, but the way Cassius blanches—the way the fight drains—makes it clear that hedoes. “You’re right,” he says, voice trembling. “You’re right, and I’ll never stop being sorry for it, but I am trying to be better than I was. To do better.”
“How touching,” Khiran sneers, the words barbed like wire. If he was to stretch any tighter, she thinks the coil would snap. Khiran tosses his napkin to the table. It lands, wrinkled from how tightly he strangled it in his grasp, on his untouched china. He offers her his hand, eyes silently begging her to take it, so they can leave.
Anna does, her eyes flitting between the two men carefully.
“Wait,” Cassius calls out. “At least stay the night. Have breakfast in the morning. Gather your strength before you leave.”
“Thank you,” Anna says, before Khiran can decline. She can feel the tension in him, coiled tighter than a spring. She doesn’t trust that his answer would be inspired by logic instead of emotion. “We’ll see you tomorrow at breakfast.”
Gratitude colors Cassius’ expression. “I’m glad to hear it. Please, sleep well. If you have need of anything, you have but to ask.”
Anna nods, unable to meet Khiran’s gaze as they turn to leave. She can feel his glare burning into her cheek. His grip on her hand is tight enough to bruise, but she doesn’t flinch away from it. She lets the pressure steady her as they walk across the courtyard, the breeze cool against her face and the sweet scent of ripe figs and apricots perfuming the air.
“You’re angry with me.” The words are an offering. Not quite an olive branch, but an invitation for him to say what she knows must be burning on his tongue.
“Yes,” he growls, but another two steps and he shakes his head. “No. It’s smart to stay.” His jaw flexes, his gaze dark with an ancient anger. “I’m just furious that we must.”
She squeezes his hand. It’s supposed to be a sign of support, but his grip immediately loosens as if taking it as a hint. Anna uses it as an opportunity to lace their fingers. “We’ll make a plan in the morning,” she promises. “About where to go next.”
He brings her hand to his lips. The kiss on her knuckle, just above her ring, feels like an apology. “I cut your dinner short. Did you have enough to eat?”
“Says the man who only had wine,” she chides, sending him a pointed look.
Khiran’s lips thin. “I found myself without an appetite.”
They reach the door to their suite. Khiran dutifully holds it open for her. Anna’s fingers trail over a marble bust that looks suspiciously like it might have been made in Cassius’ image. She waits for the door to close before she asks, “What happened between you two?” Looking up, she tries to untangle the emotions playing across his face. “You were reluctant to come here from the beginning and just now, at dinner—”
“He is one of the favorites,” he says softly, as if the words were aconfession. “When I was too young to know better, I used to hate him for it. When I grew old enough, I learned to fear it. Cassius wants to start an uprising, but what he hasn’t told you is that he isn’t the first.”
Anna’s hand falls to her side limply. She thinks of all the times he told her he had fallen out of favor. Thinks of lavender fields in France, the names he claimed as his.
I am Loki, the god of Lies. Eris, the goddess of strife. Lucifer, Wisakedjak, Eshu, Anansi, Hanuman.
Lucifer.
The angel cast from Heaven. Only it wasn’t Heaven he was really cast from, but Edun.
“It was you,” she breathes. Searching his face, she knows she’s right. Anna frowns, teeth biting into her lower lip in thought. “Cassius… he didn’t want to join you?”
Khiran’s laugh is soft but sharp. A needle hiding beneath a layer of wool. “No, but I could forgive him for that.” He shakes his head, mouth twisting in a sneer. “It was his kiss that exposed me. All my plans, my ambitions, laid bare at The First’s feet. Cassius watched me fall, knowing he was in part to blame, and he didnothing.”
The morning is cooler than the day before, both in weather and in tempers.
Gunmetal clouds sit, heavy and brimming with a summer rain yet to fall. Anna almost wishes the sky would open up and let a river of water wash them all away. It would be a good distraction and an even better conversation starter. Sitting at the table, the array of food ranging from the simit she tried yesterday and filled pastries called börek, to fresh fruits and a spread of different cheeses. The silence weighs heavier than the clouds outside.
She lowers her eyes to her plate, pretending to concentrate on the way her knife slices through her baked fig drizzled in honey andclotted cream. It’s only the sound of silver on china that assures her that the two men she’s sharing a meal with are eating at all. Even with the palpable tension, she feels a small amount of relief at the sound. At least Khiran is eating this time.
Cassius is the first to break the silence. “You’re wrong, you know,” he offers quietly. “It’s not that I’m eager, it’s that I’m desperate.” His gaze drifts to her, heavy with the kind of grief Anna recognizes in herself. The dull ache of someone long lost.
His eyes drop away, finding Khiran’s once more. “Silas and I—it’s just a matter of time before we’re discovered. It’s a small miracle we have hidden our affections for as long as we have.” He takes a bracing breath, releasing it slowly. “When we are, I imagine we will find ourselves much in the same position you find yourself in now.”
Cassius sighs, resting his chin in the curve of his cupped palm. “I understand your reluctance. You have every reason not to trust me. Why would you? But right now, as it stands, we are fighting for time. I only suggest that, if we must fight at all, we should fight to win.”
Khiran’s stare is long, weighted with a history so much older than herself. Finally, he puts his silverware down and asks, “Do you know why I stole it? The peach?”
“I assume it was your way of getting back at him.”
Khiran’s scoff is colored with dark amusement. “Perhaps in part. Mostly, I just wanted to know if I could. Was ready to pay the price if I couldn’t.”
