Page 59 of Rogue Survivor
Before I can offer a single word of comfort, he reaches into his jacket pocket and pulls out my cell phone.
“Found it in the office the gang was using. Even charged it up for you.” Dropping it into my lap, he nods and heads for the door. “You’re welcome. I’ll be back in an hour with Isabel and Veronica—if their docs okay itandthey’re up to it. Though Isabel’s been askin’ about you so much, she ain’t getting Jell-O either. While I’m gone? Call your brother. He’s sent me a dozen text messages since Zephyr put out the alert. Last one promised he’d be on a plane by morning if he didn’t hear from you.”
Quinton. When I thought I was going to die, I would have done anything to talk to him one more time. But now that we’re all safe, I have no fucking clue what to say.
Just be his brother. And tell him you’re sorry for all times you weren’t.
My hand trembles as I dial, and when the video connects, there are tears in his eyes. “Connor…” He shakes his head and passes the phone to Graham, who wraps one arm around his shoulders and holds tight.
“I should kick your ass for what you put him through,” Graham says. “But looks like someone beat me to it.”
“You should see the other guy. Or not. There ain’t much left of his face.”
Graham’s lips twitch, and Quinton swipes at his cheeks, the weariness in his expression reminding me just how much he’s been through the past six months.
“I’m sorry, Q.”
The nickname seems to surprise him, and I can’t explain why I never used it before. He started going by Q when he escaped his ex. It’s how he signs all his emails, and I never picked up on it. Never realized how such a small thing could mean so much.
“Don’t apologize,” he says quietly. “You love her, right? Isabel? Zephyr said you did, but I never thought you wanted…”
“A life outside the job?”
He offers me a sheepish grin. “Somethin’ like that.”
Just talk to him. And for fuck’s sake, be honest.
“I didn’t. Till I met her.” I try to rake my fingers through my hair, but accidentally graze the fresh stitches above my eyebrow and let out a string of curses that shocks even Graham.
“So, you’re not going back? To the FBI?” Q asks.
I can’t believe how much he’s changed in a few short months. His ex stole his confidence. Hell, he’d been so terrified, he couldn’t take two steps beyond his front door for almost a year. Now? His shoulders don’t slump. He looks me straight in the eye, and from the warning in his voice, he’ll give me hell if he doesn’t like my answer.
“No. As soon as I can get out of here, I’m puttin’ in my retirement papers. Thought I might call Pritchard. See if he needs a washed-up relic with a permanent limp on his payroll.”
“He collects them,” Graham says, chuckling. “You’ll fit right in. But fair warning. You’re committing to at least one family holiday a year. They’re a little…intense.”
“Anything that involves Ryker is intense,” Q adds. “He and Dax are the only people I’ve ever met grumpier than you, big brother. You’ll fit in just fine.”
Holidays.Familyholidays.
“Connor? You look a little…green.” Graham leans closer to the camera. “We’ll go easy on you the first time.”
“It’s not that…”
Who are you kidding? It’s absolutely that. And so much more.
“Worried about my future niece?” Q asks. “Because from what I hear, she’s as ornery as you are.”
I swallow hard, and uncertainty sits like a lead weight in my stomach.
“Never wanted a step-dad. Till now. Don’t die.”
“Connor? We’re gonna let you get some rest.” Q takes the phone from Graham, and his face fills the screen. I wish I had the words to tell him how fucking sorry I am for all the times I shut him out. “But you better call again in a couple of days. I mean it.”
My finger hovers over theEndbutton, but every time I blink, I’m back in that vault, knowing I’m about to die. “Q?”
“Yeah?” The hope in his tone breaks me, and I swallow hard. “I love you.”
