Page 46 of Storm Warning
Sticking my foot in the stirrup, I swing my other leg over the saddle, trotting slowly with no destination in mind, just a break from work and worries. Passing the main house, a clack sounds from the front door as Sawyer comes out on the porchwith his guitar. Tightening the tension on the reins, my horse slows to a stop.
“Where are you off to?” he questions, sitting down at the edge of the steps.
“Takin’ my girl for a little adventure. Anything worth checkin’ out?”
“Good day to do it,” he says, raising his hand in the air and pointing off to his right. “There’s some apple trees down that path and a field of flowers down that trail.” He points to his left. “If she wants to graze there’s a whole lot of that out there too.”
I scan around, trying to decide which path to take, until I notice an overgrown path a little further down the road toward the front gate. “What’s down that way?”
His brows furrow as his gaze wanders to where I point. “A bunch of fallen trees. Beyond that, I don’t think anything too special. Honestly, I never looked.”
Something about it draws my attention, pulling me toward it like a bee to honey. The mystery is like sweet nectar. “Guess it’s time to find out,” I say, waving goodbye and trotting toward the path. “See ya later.”
“Have fun,” he calls back.
At first, the road seems rather easy to navigate, but the further I get, the more dense it becomes. Trees envelope the path, and I wonder how long it’s been since someone found interest in whatever it leads to—if anything.
I jump down from my horse’s back once we make it to the fallen trees. A few decently large maples lay across the road, preventing anyone from continuing on, and the path beyond is hidden in overgrown grass and weeds, almost as if it was never there to begin with.
I can’t help my curiosity, but assume that nothing of value lies beyond these trees since they were never removed. My horse whinnies as if to tell me she’s ready to move on.
“Yeah yeah, Jelly Bean, I know. No sense bein’ parked here for nothin’.”
I mount her once again, before we make our way back down the trail towards the apple trees. She doesn’t have to speak to tell me she loves it here. Unlike our ranch, this place was made for more than just cattle. You could seclude yourself to it and completely avoid the hustle and bustle of the city. Add a few chickens, dairy cows, and some crops, and it would have it all. The more time I spend here, the more I find myself not wanting to leave, and everyday it feels like I found an escape from the noise. Maybe that’s because no one else is here, or maybe that’s because this place holds some magic. I’m not sure which, but I’m convinced it’s a mixture of both.
We approach the orchard and I hop down from her back, grabbing an apple, and smiling as she takes it from my hand, the velvet of her lips rubbing on my palm. I’m thankful that she gets to be with me while I try to navigate helping my parents and also figuring out my next move. I pluck another apple from the tree, pulling a knife from my pocket and cutting a slice off to eat. Sitting down next to one of the trees, I lean against the trunk, dropping my hands to my lap and looking over the land. A wistful feeling settles over me as I let out a deep sigh.
I had my dream and then I watched it wither away. I carry the weight of that loss everyday, but I shelf my feelings because I know I can stop this ride whenever I want. I just don’t think I will until those who matter to me don’t have to sit with worry on their shoulders everyday too. I rub my eyes as if it can wipe away the pain I push down deep. Everyday I feel the life drain out of me, but not in the dying kind of way, just in the surviving kind of way. I didn’t realize up until yesterday with Kaylee how bad it’s really been, but with her all of this feels different. Like it was all meant to happen.
She makes me feel alive again. From her touch of sass, tothe way she can’t help but bare that pretty smile when she thinks I’m funny. She doesn’t realize she’s been a light in this bit of darkness. Probably doesn’t know the darkness is even there. And I don’t know where our relationship, if I can call it that, is going, but I’m thankful for it.
I pull my hat over my face as if it’ll hide my emotions from the world, not that anyone’s here to see them. The heat feels suffocating, so I toss it to the ground and let my head clunk back on to the trunk. I can feel the warmth of the sun on my skin and a small breeze brush my cheeks. A comforting hug from nature, one I desperately need.
I wish I had all the answers. Hell, I always thought I did, but right now I’m adrift without a compass. It feels like what used to drive me, set me on fire, now puts out a flame. I can’t help but wonder what’s more true at this point: do I miss it or am I terrified of it?
A nudge finds its place on my shoulder, pulling me out of my daze.
“Another apple, huh, Jelly Bean?” I laugh, reaching up to give her a piece I cut off for myself, but she doesn’t take it. She nudges me again, then again when I don’t do anything. “Ready to leave?”
She steps towards me and puts her head over my shoulder, turning her neck almost as if she’s trying to pull me closer. I reach up and wrap my arms around her, hugging her for a moment that lingers into another.
“Thanks girl,” I murmur, stepping back to pet her forehead, brushing my fingers through her mane. “I needed that.”
We ride back toward the house, and as much as I try to put my worries aside, my mind feels restless, frustrated. Fuck, I need a better distraction. I think of those fallen trees and the overgrown path behind them. Where does it lead? And why do I feel so drawn to it?
Taking Jelly Bean back to the barn, I remove her gear andwash her down before letting her and Wrangler loose in the corral.
The soft strum of a guitar floats in the air and I glance toward the porch. Sure enough, Sawyer’s still there, plucking away.
“Hey, ya got a chainsaw around here?” I yell as I approach.
His brows knit together. “Uh, yeah we have one off that shed behind the barn. I used it recently so it should be ready to go. Can’t stop thinking about those trees?”
I smile. “Bingo.”
“Me too.” He chuckles. “Want some help?”
I give him a mock bow. “I’d be honored.”
