Page 112 of Beauty At Stake
The rest of my family was gathered on the porch, sprawled on chairs or leaning against the railing. The cool night air was refreshing, helping to clear away the remains of the day.
“Yes, I agree,” Sever said. He looked at me. “Have you forgiven me yet?”
I jerked back. “What?”
“You looked at me with such anger, Seren. And then you ignored me when I called to you. You went to him instead.”
Everyone went silent.
Then he added, “Is this thing between Astaroth and you truly over?”
The silence deepened.
“I can't tell you what the future holds,” I finally answered him. “And to be completely honest, Anu's warning still bothers me. There is something between Star and me. But, as you said, it's manageable. It's just a crush now.”
“Crushes develop into more,” Killian said.
“Yes, and it did, but now it's back to being a crush.” I looked at Sever. “I got angry because you attacked him mercilessly. It felt like it was about me, not Star's teasing. And I ignored you because you hurt him badly. I was worried about him, and I believe that worry was warranted. It had nothing to do with my feelings for him. That fire is banked.”
“Only because you demanded that Anu end his influence,” Sever said. “I'd be happier if you were done with him.”
“Who? Star or Anu?” Killian drawled.
“Yes,” Sever said.
My husbands chuckled.
“Sever—”
He held up a hand and went on, “As you said, we each have our own journeys with God. If I expect others to be patient with me, I must show acceptance of you and your relationship with Anu.”
“I'm angry with him.” I looked out at the dark garden, then back at Sever. “I'm annoyed and tired of all this divine bullshit.”
Killian snorted a laugh.
“But I can't forget all the good things he's done for me. For us.”
“Love, you use that line a lot.” Tiernan, sitting on my left, took my hand and kissed it to soften the sting. “You get mad at Anu, then you calm down and you say that very same line, as if it wipes the slate clean. But how many times does that god get a free pass? When will the balance be broken? Because I must say that the bad he's done has already outweighed the good in my estimation.”
I sighed. “How much weight does a life hold? Thirty of them? Forty? I don't remember the number of people Anu brought back from the dead for me. And then there's my life.” I squeezed his hand. “Yours.” I looked around, smiling briefly at my father and Eibhleann, then focusing on my husbands. “All of our lives have been saved, in one way or another, by Anu. And what has he done that's so awful? Bring me and Sever together?” I motioned at Sever. “It's what Danu does, and so we accepted it. But then he tried again with Star, and it was too much. Not because his actions were despicable, but because our family is full. Danu did this to me four times.Four. And all of you were fine with it. You were the ones who convinced me to accept our relationships. But only to a point, evidently. And only if it's orchestrated by your Goddess.”
The men looked away. All but Sever.
“I can't speak about what Danu did or why all of you forgave her for it.” Sever straightened out of his lean. “But I can say that Anu doesn't push people together out of a sense of romance or because he believes they are perfect for each other. He does it to further his plans.”
“Anu isn't as involved with his children as Danu is with hers,” I said.
“He isn't?” Sever lifted a pale brow. “Or is that another myth that he's convinced us to take as truth?”
We went silent again. Most of my family had a limited experience with Anu. They were Fairies. Not his children. But Killian, Sever, and I knew God—Sever knew him best.
Into the silence, Sever said, “There's a line about the Devil. How his greatest trick is making humans believe he doesn't exist. Well, Anu wants the opposite for himself. All of Heaven and Hell believe in him, but they don't give him the kind of worship that humans do. And that worship has dwindled. Over the centuries, humans have divided God into many deities and then waged wars over who did it right. Anu doesn't like that, and not just because of all the bloodshed. God is love, but he is also the negative emotions that accompany love—including jealousy. Our god is a jealous god.”
“Sever, what are you saying?” I whispered.
“I think that all of this.” He waved his hands out. “All the drama and battles. Everything that has happened these last few years has led to the enlightenment of Earth. There isn't a soul on this planet who doesn't believe in God now—one God.”
“Holy shit,” Daxon whispered. “He's right.”
