Page 18 of Capture Me
“I’mglad you’re still here.” Ellie's arms wrap around my waist as she sneaks up behind me.
“Just making coffee.” I reach for another cup before filling it with the hot brown liquid. I turn around in her arms, wrapping her in mine. “I’m sorry for leaving like I did last time.”
“I hated it, but I understand why you did,” she says. She smiles a small smile; it’s filled with kindness and understanding. I reach up not being about to help it, I graze my thumb over her bottom lip.
“I’ve missed you.” I take my time drinking in her features. I didn’t think I’d ever be this close to her ever again.
She presses a kiss to my thumb. “I missed you too.” As she speaks her left eyebrow quirks up for a millisecond. It’s gone before it’s even fully there but I know that twitch well.
“What’s on your mind, Ellie?” I ask.
“You know me, I just worry. At least you know that hasn’t changed,” she says trying to lighten the sudden atmosphere that’s descended.
“Tell me. Let me help soothe your worries,” I tell her.
“There’s just still so much that we don’t know about each other, high school was such a long time ago. It’s great that the feelings are still there but I worry the more you get to know who I am now you’ll be disappointed,” she states quietly.
“That could never happen,” I tell her with conviction in my voice. How could she ever think that?
I see her eyes flash with something unknown before she breaks eye contact with me.
“Here’s an idea, let’s get to know each other. What is it that you want to know? I’ll tell you anything if you just ask,” I say trying to ease her into relaxing so she feels more comfortable to tell me.
“It’s more, the other way around. There’s something you don’t know, something I’ve wanted to tell you since it happened.” She pauses and my mind starts to wander. She’s married, she’s got children with her ex-husband, she cheated on me in high school…
“What is it?” I ask, rapidly trying to cut off my own thoughts before they start to sink in.
“Well, you know last night how I said you didn’t know the real reason...we broke up?” she says shyly.
“Yeah, but I thought we covered that last night?” I answer confused.
“Kind of. Your mom was right in what she said, I didn’t want to hold you back but what I didn’t tell you was...,” I can see she’s visibly struggling to get her words out, instinctually my hands reach for hers. “What you didn’t know was that I was pregnant when you left,” she finally finishes.
“What?” I answer. My mind unable to comprehend the information that’s just been unleashed to me.
“Nearly three months,” she adds.
“I don’t understand,” I say running my hand down my face.
“I had it taken care of after you left. I didn’t want to tell you at the time, your life was planned out. I knew what you’d do if I’d told you,” she admits. She’s visibly shaking.
My resolve weakens. “You still should’ve told me. El, I deserved to know.”
“I know but then you would’ve wanted to keep it and stay here. I loved you so much I couldn’t stand to see you give up your dreams for us. You have to understand, I did what was best for the both of us,” she says. Her voice trembles as she speaks.
“I’m sorry El.” I feel the tear trail down my cheek, I pull Ellie’s body to mine. I squeeze her tight as I continue to leak silent tears. Silently crying over the child I unknowingly lost, over the fact that Ellie went through this all on her own. Over all the time I’ve spent hating her for causing me so much pain in the past when really it was all my fault.
Ellie’s just bared her soul to me, and I vow that she’s not going to regret it. I’m going to cherish her for as long as she’ll have me because she is worth it. She’s worth every bit of heartache I can stand and more. She is my life, the very air I breathe.
“How about we get ready and go out for ice cream?” she says changing the subject and lifting this cloud of sadness that has descended upon us.
“It’s not even lunchtime…?” I question her as I try to hold in a bout of laughter.
“I know.” She shrugs adorably like that’s all the explanation that’s required. She turns back around to look me in the eye impatiently awaiting my answer.
My smile grows wide as I shake my head in disbelief. It’s not like I’m going to say ‘no’ to her, is it? I could never, and I would never, say ‘no’ to her. I just hope she feels the same way.
Tomorrow I plan on sneaking off to see Ellie’s parents, I want their blessing because I have a feeling I’m going to be asking Ellie a very important question, and soon. Call me a possessive, insecure beast but I need to know that she’s mine. Bonded to me in every way humanly possible. Last time it was so easy for her to walk away, I won’t be letting her go again.
The End
