Page 123 of Broken Butterfly
“Hey, baby girl. Mama’s here,” I tell Elizabeth Ann as I lay a blanket on the grass in front of her gravestone. Once I smooth the blanket out, I put on some gardening gloves and start to weed the flower bed that surrounds the base of the statue. Several swallowtail and Painted Lady butterflies flutter from flower to flower in search of nectar.
“Ryder, your uncle Julien, Elijah, Daniel, and Drew will be out here later, but I wanted some time alone with my sweet girl. Your Grandma and Pawpaw Jameson weren’t able to come with us this time, but they promise to make a special trip to see you soon. A lot has happened since I was last here,” I tell her, wiping the dirt off my bare legs and flinging my garden gloves back in the bag I brought with me.
The day is nice and temperate, if a bit breezy. Strands of my long, blond hair come loose from its ponytail and plaster to the side of my face and neck. “Ryder and I set a date for our wedding. By this time next year, I will officially be Mrs. Ryder Cutton. We’re getting married at the botanical gardens where Ryder took me on our first date.”
I lay down on my stomach and kick my bare feet up in the air, my torso propped up on my elbows. I tell Elizabeth Ann about Peter and how Fallon delivered justice for us and our family.
I haven’t seen Fallon in months, not since I last spoke to him. I have to admit, I miss him. He hasn’t texted me or tried to call. Fallon is still trying to protect me, but this time he thinks he’s protecting me from himself. A week after New Year’s, I asked him to meet me. I wasn’t even sure he would show up, but I should have known better. Fallon has never let me down.
“Kitten, I’m so sorry.”
“Shut up, Fallon,” I sob and throw my arms around him. He stiffens, his body locking ramrod straight. Perhaps he was expecting me to still be angry or blame him. Perhaps he thought I would hate him like he kept saying I would.
“Thank you,” I whisper against his cheek.
I feel him begin to tremble against me, but I don’t let him go.
“You always told me that I would wind up hating you. You said that you were my nightmare, the villain. You’re not, Fallon. You’re my hero. I don’t know how fucked up that may sound. I must be fucked-up to think it. Never feel a minute’s regret for what happened. Thank you, Fallon, for protecting me. For being the justice I needed for my family, for my daughter, and for me.”
I kiss his cheek and allow my eyes to roam his face, taking the time to memorize every feature of the man who saved me from the devil and from myself. I will never regret my decision to run off with him and travel around the world, nor will I ever regret a single day I spent with him.
“My life is waiting for me. You brought me the closure I needed to move on. If you need forgiveness for something that wasn’t your fault, then I gladly give it to you. Peter killed himself. He’s the one responsible for his death. You’re the hero of the story, Fallon, not the villain. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to live a fulfilling life with no regrets and no guilt.”
I press my lips to his forehead and let them remain there for a moment. “I love you, Fallon Parker Montgomery. Thank you for saving me.”
I’ve talked to Ryder a lot about Fallon, and about what happened with Peter. I’m at peace with how things ended. I have my closure. For all intents and purposes, justice was served.
Speaking of justice, the DA accepted Maria’s plea deal and Marshall was arrested. He made bail and was awaiting trial, but the Fates stepped in yet again and delivered their own form of judgment. Marshall was killed by a drunk driver last month. I allowed the charges against Maria to be dropped anyway. I did it for me, wanting that part of my life to be over.
On a happier note, Meredith has started dating Bryce, Sara’s brother. I always thought Trevor would have been a good match for her, but he remains steadfast in his bachelorhood. Even though Fallon has been absent from my life and I miss him dearly, Trevor and I still see each other regularly on campus and on the weekends. Trevor has become a part of our piecemeal family and he helps fill the gap for Julien with the loss of Jayson. Trevor has also stepped up for Fallon in a big way. Fallon split his company stocks with him so he could be on the board and help direct the future of Montgomery Pharma. Turns out, Trevor is really good at business, which I find funny for someone who majored in marine biology.
Devon and his mom moved into my house two months ago, and Mrs. Riley is working at Montgomery Pharma as an executive assistant. Devon is thriving and happy. He joined the junior varsity basketball team at our old middle school, and Ryder and I went to one his games. I foresee Devon playing professional basketball one day.
I sit up and cross my legs, lifting my guitar from beside the blanket and situating it in my lap. I sing a few lullabies to Elizabeth Ann and a new song I wrote for her called “Butterfly Kisses.” I place the guitar down and reach inside the bag to pull out the book I brought with me. As I’m about to openThe Adventures of Winnie the Pooh, a pair of booted feet appear in my peripheral vision.
I shield my eyes with my hand and look up.
“Hey you,” I’m able to say, even though my heart is galloping like a herd of runaway horses.
Jayson sits down beside me on the blanket.
“Sorry I’m late.”
Despite the promise we made to each other, I wasn’t expecting him to show up today. He looks different now. He’s thinner but still muscular. His brown hair is longer and it curls around his ears, and he has grown a short beard. It looks good on him.
“I’m glad you’re here. I was getting ready to read her a story.” I hand him the book.
I lean back, close my eyes, and listen to the cadence of his deep voice. I miss his voice. I miss my friend.
When Jayson finishes the story, we unearth the lockbox we buried here months ago. I hand him my letter to her, and he places mine and his inside the box and re-seals it. Jayson buries it again, then sits an old-fashioned stuffed bear on the base of her gravestone. He stands up and looks across to the horizon. I watch him as he takes a deep breath in and exhales it out slowly.
I stand as well and am the first to speak. “I’m sorry, Jayson. I’m so sorry for hurting you.”
“I think we’ve been hurting each other for a while, ever since I climbed through your window that night and kissed you for the first time.”
“A part of my heart will always love you.”
“But it will never be enough. I’ll never be able to forgive you for choosing him and not me. I’m having to figure out how to start a new life without you. It’s been hard to do. I’m still finding my way.” He pauses. “Have you read the letter yet?”
