Page 195 of Merry Christmas, You Filthy Animal
“That’s a tangled web.” He nods at me. “So you like her?”
“Yeah, I love her, man.”
His lips purse, and then he pushes off the desk. “Well then, how can I help?”
“I’m glad you asked.”
Chapter Thirty-Two
Max
Narrator: Looks like there could be some brotherly love finally in Max’s life. At least it’s a decent start. Now the question is, will he be able to make things better with Betty? It’s a large undertaking, given what he put her through, but if I know Max like I think I know him, there is no way he’s going to go down without a fight.
And this fight... makes me think he’s going to go full-on Max.
If you thought dancing in lederhosen was questionable, I think you need to be prepared for what is about to happen.
“Does everyone understand their roles?” I ask as I look around Storee’s living room, taking in the people who showed up for me. After talking with Ansel, I knew I had to bring the team together to figure out how to make this better.
And that included everyone in town, because she isn’t just hurting because of me; she’s embarrassed about the town being a part of my master plan. So... I gathered everyone I could to help.
There’s Storee and Cole, Taran and Guy—not Gus—Dwight, Bob Krampus and BKJ, Mr. Dankworth, Martha and Mae, and of course Tanya and Sherry. If I’m going to pull this off, I’m going to need all of them.
They all nod as they stare at the plan we’ve all worked together to create, the ultimate booby-trapped meet-cute. If executed properly, it will give me just enough time to try to talk to her and convince her that I’m still the man she thought I was. At least that’s what I’m hoping.
“I can’t thank you guys enough. I know I fucked this up royally, but if we’re able to pull this off and she gives me a second chance, I’ll be indebted to you all.”
“Can I get that in writing?” Dwight says, standing off to the side, arms crossed.
“Yes,” I say sincerely just as there’s a knock at the door.
Knowing exactly who that is, I open it and find Ansel on the other side. I told him to show up a little bit later because I didn’t want Dwight to become defensive the moment he stepped foot in the house. I wanted his approval of this plan, so I had Ansel wait.
“Is he here?” he asks.
“He is.” I nod for him to come in and point to the dining room, away from everyone else. “Dwight.”
He turns to face me, and when he sees Ansel, his brow scrunches.
“Can we have a chat?”
He thinks about it for a second, but then he pushes off the wall and walks toward the dining room as well.
When we’re all together, I motion to Ansel. “Go ahead.”
Ansel lets out a deep breath, and then reaches into his pocket and pulls out the ornament. Dwight’s expression morphs from angry to sad in seconds as he takes the ornament from Ansel and stares down at it.
“I’m really fucking sorry,” Ansel says. “I didn’t know it was your ornament. And I know what I’m about to say is not an excuse because what I did was shitty, but I was trying to pull a joke on Felix. He said he was putting up an ornament like yours on the tree and wishing for a man in leather pants for Christmas. When I saw the ornament up there, I thought it would be funny to take it down. So I went with some friends, grabbed the ornament, and left. It was stupid and ridiculous, and when I asked Felix about his wish coming true and he said he was excited because his ornament was still on the tree, I was... well, I was fucking devastated, because I knew I’d stolen someone else’s wish, and it’s been a tough pill to swallow. I’ve held on to the ornament all these years, unsure of what to do with it.” He sticks his hands in his pockets. “I’m really sorry, dude. I wish I could take it all back, but unfortunately, I can’t. All I can do is apologize and return the ornament.”
Dwight runs his finger over the wood ornament, studying it for a good amount of time. When he looks up at Ansel, his eyes are full of tears. “I hate you for taking this.”
“I know,” Ansel says. “You have the right to hate me.”
“But,” Dwight continues, “Jessica made this ornament, and it’s... it’s one of few things I have left of her, so... thank you for returning it.”
“She did?” Ansel asks.
“Yeah, she sold them with her mom over at the vendor booths before BKJ took over. This is... this is special. Thank you.”
