Page 94 of Bridesmaid By Chance
“I still want to hold you.”
I squeeze my eyes shut because fuck!
There it is, that voice, those words, they’re like a drug I never knew I needed but that I crave.
“Please,” he says softly. I clamp my mouth shut, my frustration rocking through me, because why? Why does he have to be like this? When Melva wrote out this plan, did she expect him to show this softer side? I don’t think she did. This is a major flaw, a flaw that is eating away at my self-control.
Second by second, I feel myself falter.
I feel myself give in.
And before I can tell him to fuck off, I scoot a few inches back.
And then a few more…
And a few more until his arm wraps around me and tugs me into his chest.
I can feel myself holding my breath as he snuggles in close, as his head goes to my hair, as his hand clamps around my middle, bunching the shirt up.
“Relax,” he says. “Stop thinking.”
“You realize that you’re the reason why I’m thinking so much. You’re the reason why I’m second-guessing all of this. You are the reason why I’m a neurotic mess.”
“I know.” He turns me on my back, and I’m forced to look up at him again. “And I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I don’t know how to handle this. And I’m sorry I’ve made a difficult situation even more difficult. I don’t want you to feel like—as you put it—a neurotic mess.”
He’s so close, so sincere, that once again, he pulls me back in.
I know I should give him hell.
I know I should tear myself away, but for the life of me, I can’t.
Instead, I quietly nod and say, “Thank you for apologizing.”
“Thank you for taking care of me today.”
Needing to break the seriousness of this moment, I say, “Just doing my wifely duties.”
“It was appreciated.”
“Should be, given how you were on the airplane.”
He shrugs and then lightens the mood as well. “I didn’t like that Devin fuck.”
The levity in the moment makes me chuckle as his hand presses against my stomach. This is what I’ve wanted. Hudson talking, chuckling, joking. Him being comfortable, it’s all I’ve been hoping for when he calls me wife, when he says he’s taking this marriage seriously. I’ve wanted this appreciation. “You didn’t like him because he’s the one man who has ever truly pleasured me.”
“And as your husband, I don’t appreciate that.”
“Because as my husband,youhave yet to pleasure me.”
His expression falls flat, which makes me laugh even harder. “Not fucking funny.”
I press my hand to his cheek, staring into his sultry eyes. “I agree. It’s a real problem. We might need you to see a doctor.”
“Yeah, to make sure my blue balls aren’t about to fall off.”
Oh.
My.
