Page 185 of How My Neighbour Stole Christmas
Oh, shit.
The death scan is coming.
She doesn’t use it often, but when she does, I swear she can see right through me.
“What are you not telling me?” she asks.
“Nothing,” I squeak.
“You’re hiding something.”
Cue the sweat.
“Taran.” I feign laughter. “I’m not hiding anything from you. Can’t a girl change her mind because she’s full of the holiday spirit? I guess I just forgot how magical it is here.”
She studies me some more. Those X-ray eyes cut through me, and after what feels like a full minute, she says, “You’re seeing him, aren’t you?”
“What?” I ask, my eyes wide, my heart pounding.
“Cole. You’re seeing him.”
“Uh…what? Ha, no,” I say.
“Yes, you are.”
“No, I’m not.” I stab my finger against the counter, trying to make a point.
“Then why do you want to stay? Why…why are you crying when he sings? Why are you allowing him to kiss you?”
Shit. She’s too smart, too clever.
I consider telling her the truth, but I really don’t want this to blow up before the competition is over, right before Christmas. From the way she’s reacting now, I know it won’t go over well.
“Because…because I’ve been feeling low,” I say, which isn’t a lie. I have been. I didn’t know how low I was feeling until I showed up here and started to hang out with Cole more. “And Kringle just reminded me that I don’t have to be living this dull, cooped-up life in my apartment. That there is community all around. And things to do. I just…I like it here. And the thing with Cole, that’s…that’s…”
So real.
So wonderful.
So life-altering.
“That’s for the competition.”
The coffee brews behind her, the fresh, comforting smell filling the kitchen. She tilts her head to the side, and I try to remain as cool and calm as I can while I wait for her response. After a moment she says, “You’ve been feeling…lost?”
I let out my pent-up breath and nod. “Yeah, didn’t really realize it until I got here.”
“Why?” she asks, looking concerned.
“I don’t know.” I think about it for a second. “I guess I’ve felt lonely. Hard to have a job in a place where you don’t know many people and you don’t have to report to an office. I have a few friends, but it feels different being here. Everything happens on a deeper level. You know?”
She nods and then grabs two reindeer mugs for us.
“I know what you mean. I don’t have the connection to this place like you do, but I do love Aunt Cindy, and I’ve been feeling nostalgic since being here.” Jesus, she’s talking to me. I try not to make sudden movements because I don’t want to scare her away. “It’s why I’ve really wanted to help her win this thing. I know how much it means to her. I know that she’s okay, but she was talking about how she’s not sure how many more healthy years she has left to compete in the competition. So this means a lot to her.”
For some reason, guilt consumes me.
Don’t know why.
