Page 192 of Bridesmaid Undercover
Time to go with the truth. It’s the only way she won’t hate me. The only way I won’t hurt her.
“This is complicated. I fucking like you, Everly. The reason I’ve been weird around you, it’s because I realized that I like you and it—fuck—it threw me for a loop. The day I went to go see Maple at the zoo, she pointed out my feelings to me. She opened my eyes and showed me that she isn’t the one I actually want, that the person I’m supposed to be dating is you.”
Still confused, she scoots away, but I don’t let her get that far. I close the space between us as she leans against the wall behind her. “I don’t understand, Hardy.”
“I know. I’m not making sense. I’ve just been blind to the way I feel about it, and Maple helped me see it. Then last night, the entire party, Polly, Ken, and Maple were all working overtime to get us together. And why didn’t I just ask you out myself? Well, I was worried that you had put me in the friend zone, and that’s why I was being weird. Why I was avoiding you and distancing myself. I was fucking nervous you didn’t feel the same feelings as I do, and I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable.”
“But…Iwasfeeling the same way,” she says quietly, which just cuts me deeper.
“I know that now,” I say. “And last night, well, I took a fucking chance, and it was the best chance I ever took. I can’t tell you how amazing it was. I…I got lost in you.” I push my hand through my hair. “I still feel lost in you.”
“Then…then why leave? Why make me believe that you want someone else? Why did you try to hurt me this morning?”
I look away, hating myself. “I wasn’t trying to hurt you, Everly. I was…ugh, fuck, this is complicated. Hudson texted me this morning. I guess I texted him last night and told him how amazing you were at kissing and how much I liked you.” She doesn’t move, barely blinks, doesn’t offer me any sort of reassurance that what I’m saying is making any sense. “Well, this morning, he pointed something out to me that I overlooked, something that’s important.” I look into her gorgeous eyes and hate every goddamn second of this. “Since you technically work for us but more importantly, for Haisley, I can’t, uh…I can’t be engaging in anything romantic.”
“Oh.” She looks away, still not giving me any indication of where her head is.
“Yeah, and it’s a long backstory, but Hudson reminded me that Haisley is very serious about us, as in her brothers, not getting romantically involved with anyone she works with.”
She slowly nods. “I get it.”
“Trust me, Everly, if I had it my way?—”
“No, I get it, Hardy,” she says with an edge to her voice, the first indication of what she’s feeling. And then to my surprise, she rises from the bed, letting the sheets slide off her body.
“Everly, you believe me, right?”
“Yeah, of course,” she replies, even though her voice is not convincing at all. She goes straight to her robe that is hanging on the back of her bathroom door. For a brief moment, I let my eyes travel down her body, my mind taking me back to last night when I had my mouth all over her silky, soft skin. But beforeI can fully start to reminisce, she slips the robe on, cinches it tightly around her waist, and then goes to her kitchen.
Fuck.
Not wanting her to get too far away from me, I walk up to her. “Why does it seem like you don’t believe me?”
She pulls down a mug from the cabinet and then turns to face me. “Why don’t I believe you? Uh, I don’t know, Hardy, maybe because you just gave me several reasons why this can’t work out between us.”
I grip my forehead. “Yeah, I know, it wasn’t?—”
“How about this. Just tell me that it was a one-night thing for you and walk away, because that would be a whole lot easier. And it wouldn’t string me along.”
“I’m not trying to string you along,” I say.
“You’re not?” she shouts. “So, then you just tell me all of these things last night about how much you want me, how much you like me. How beautiful I am, how you’ve held back from kissing me. Then you nearly leave my apartment without saying goodbye—the only reason you spoke to me was because I woke up. Then you give me some shit excuse about work, then tell me you want to be with Maple again, andthenkiss me after sending me into a tailspin of asking myself what I did to make you bolt. You made me feel used, unwanted, not good enough. Do you see what I’m dealing with here, Hardy? You’re all over the place, so I’m sorry if I don’t sound convinced that you really mean what you’renowsaying.”
“But I do,” I say, growing in frustration with myself. “I meant those things that I said.”
“Well, you sure have a funny way of showing it.”
“Everly, listen, I didn’t handle things well this morning, but I promise you, this wasn’t a one-night thing for me,” I say.
“So, then you want to be with me?” she says, hand on her hip.
“Yes, I do.”
“But…” She waves her hand, knowing exactly what I’m going to say next.
“Fuck.” I pull on my hair. “I…I can’t.”
“That’s what I thought.” Staring at me, her eyes welling up, she shakes her head and says in a calmer tone, “Hardy, please. If you even remotely care about me, even a little, just leave, okay?”
