Page 124 of Bridesmaid Undercover
Subject: RE: Almond Bay
Henrietta,
Almond Bay is so cute. I love it there. And The Almond Store is the sweetest place. I bought some almond extract and I’ve hoarded it, using it for only the best of recipes. And the cookies, I can already tell you, are a fifty out of ten. They are my absolute favorite. If I knew you were going up there, I would have asked you to buy more so I could freeze them and save them for a special night…alone…in my apartment.
But I’ll look forward to the ones that you send to the office. I’ll be sure not to share with Maggie. She visits Hattie enough that I deserve to have some of my own.
By the way, have you heard from Brody? He came into the office the other day announcing he’s made a full recovery. He then joked around about being a disaster when he was delirious before his appendix burst. He’s had a few disasters, and he couldn’t tell which moment was worse. It was a competitionbetween the appendix and passing out in Bora Bora when he thought a snake had bitten him. He told me the story and I voted for the fake snake bite.
He couldn’t control the appendix, but the fake snake bite—that was all on him.
Do you agree?
Eager to hear your response.
The Prof
P.S. Not much to do with the bach party. Everything is pretty much set up, and I’m just waiting on Haisley. I think it’s going to be a go with the house. Working with catering right now on dips and drinks. Also working on that playlist. Wasn’t planning on many decorations, but rather using the rental’s Clueless-inspired theme to lead the way. Let me know if you want anything else.
To:Everly Plum
From: Hardy Hopper
Subject: RE: Almond Bay
Professor,
Back in San Francisco, and if it weren’t for a stack of meetings on my schedule, I would have dropped off the cookies myself, but unfortunately wearing a suit and acting like a grownup has prevented a personal delivery.
For a moment, I considered showing up to the meetings in my pink suit but thought better of it. It didn’t prevent me from teasing Hudson about wearing it, which in turn made him beg me to have some semblance of professionalism. Can you tell who the uptight one is?
As for Brody, yes, we’ve heard from him. I talked to him on the phone and I’m really glad he’s doing better. He said Maggie was getting really clingy because of how scared she was. Said she was more scared about the appendix than the snake bite.
Which brings me to your question…easily the snake bite outweighs the appendix bursting. But there were some other things that happened on that Bora Bora trip that could have been equally embarrassing. I saw him throw up in the sand, and I’ve seen his bare ass on the beach after Maggie pantsed him. I watched him almost get his penis speared, and I’ve also seen him shake his ass in a tiny Speedo on a rocking boat. I would classify that entire trip as a loss for him, a never-ending disaster that will forever live rent free in my mind.
And if there’s nothing else for the bach party, then I’m good. As long as we’re set with the dips. Remember…the dips are important. I will live and die on these dips!
Henrietta
P.S. I drank my coffee from our special mug this morning.
“Thanks so much,”Hudson says as we finish up our last meeting of the day. “Appreciate your time.”
“Of course,” Peggy says. She’s from a marketing firm we might consider hiring. The chances are slim but possible.
She exits the conference room, and when the door clicks shut behind her, Hudson exhales and leans back in his chair.
“What did you think?” he asks.
I lean back too and loosen the knot of my tie. “I think I’m not cut out for this corporate stuff. Why can’t I be like Jude and be more hands-on? Be in the thick of construction or, I don’t know…making sandwiches for people.”
“What?” he asks, dumbfounded. “Hardy, I need someone in these meetings with me. I need someone helping me make decisions, and since you’re my brother and partner, you need to be here.”
“What if I gave you the go-ahead to make any decision you want,” I say…joking.
“Only to have you bitch about it later? Not a fucking chance.”
Damn it, he knows me too well.
