Page 163 of Bridesmaid Undercover
“Okay, are you ready?” Polly asks as she holds up a ping-pong ball. “Because we’re ready to smoke you.”
I lean in close to Everly. “Heads-up, the trash talk is very embarrassing.”
“I gathered that already. Figured it was an elderly thing.” She smirks up at me.
“Funny,” I say just as Polly shoots off her first ball, missing the pyramid completely.
Oh boy, this might be easier than I thought.
“Whoa, damn,” Polly says, “that was not quite accurate.”
“Baby, that was the opposite of accurate,” Ken says as he lifts his hand and takes a shot for himself, sending the ping-pong ball right at my chest, hitting me directly on the nipple. The ball falls to the ground, but the damage has been done because immediately my nipple goes hard, pointing against the thin fabric of my T-shirt.
And my drunk friends, of course, don’t let it go unnoticed.
“The nipple,” Polly says, pointing. “You did it, Ken, you erected the nipple.”
Ken narrows his gaze, leaning forward to take a good look. And when he notices what he’s done, he claps loudly. “I got the nipple! I got the nipple.”
Jesus.
Christ.
Everly now leans forward to look at my chest.
“Oh wow, that’s a hard nipple,” she says.
“He has the best nipples,” Polly says, picking up her drink. “The most sensitive nipples you’ll ever see. Just from a light breeze, his nipples will be erect. We could predict when a storm was coming in by the way one nipple would get hard and the other wouldn’t.”
Ken leans on the table and looks Everly in the eyes. “His nipples predicted the weather more accurately than the weather app.”
“Is that right?” Everly says. “What a fantastic attribute to have.”
“When we graduated from college, I was lost,” Ken says. “A storm would roll in and I was completely caught off guard.”
“His nipples once predicted an ice storm that no one saw coming,” Polly says. “Saved our cars from sliding down the hill.” She slowly claps. “Love those nipples.”
“Okay,” I say, rubbing my nipple to calm it down. “That’s enough.”
Polly leans in. “Did I mention he’s sensitive about them?”
“Very sensitive,” Ken says. “Maple even once said that he likes?—”
“I said that’s enough,” I say quickly before my drunk friends can spill any more information about my likes and dislikes.
Just makes me realize that I need to end this game quickly.
I pick up the ping-pong ball and without even having to focus, I shoot it forward, scoring it in the top spot.
“Damn it,” Polly says. “I forgot how good he is.”
“I didn’t.” Ken puffs his chest. “Why did you think I went for the nipple, to try to distract him.”
“It didn’t work,” Polly says.
“I’ll try again. I’ll go for the left next time.”
Everly chuckles next to me.
