Page 84 of So This Is War
“Fuck,” Ollie says.
“Well, that’s . . . wow.” Penny shakes her head.
“Did not see that coming,” Blakely adds. “Now I understand the boner.”
“It all makes sense,” Ollie says.
“See? Do you see what I’m dealing with? And I don’t know how to handle it. I refuse to take care of the boner because I know I’ll picture her, and the minute I picture her, it will make my need for her ten times worse.”
“Wait, you’re not jacking off?” Penny asks.
I shake my head. “My perfectly shaped balls are a midnight blue at this point.”
“Posey.” Ollie leans in and places her hand on the table. “Dude, you have to take care of the boner, even if you picture her. You can’t be this backed up and function intelligently.”
“She’s right,” Penny says. “After I gave birth to Holden, Eli said he wouldn’t do anything sexual because I couldn’t do anything for at least six weeks. After two weeks, he was dazed, confused, and didn’t know how to put shoes on anymore. I decided to take care of it for him. I hate to admit it, but you have to jerk off to get through this.”
“But . . . I’m going to envision her.”
“Then live through your fantasies,” Ollie says. “But for the love of God, take care of it.”
“And if you need to, maybe watch some porn. That might distract you,” Winnie says.
I roll my teeth over my bottom lip. “Okay, but what do I do in the meantime? This feeling I have for her, it’s not going to go away.”
“Have you told her that she’s making you hard?” Blakely asks. “A little communication might help.”
“I don’t want to sound like an asshole who can’t keep it together if she goes braless.”
“But you are the asshole who can’t keep it together when she goes braless,” Penny says.
“I know, but she doesn’t need to know that.”
“Maybe set ground rules again,” Winnie says. “And honestly, you can just say, hey, I appreciate everything you’re doing, but I have to say, you’re really hot and making me hard when you walk around without a bra. I don’t want to be a creep, but I thought you should know.”
“That’s a nice way to put it,” Ollie says. “I’d put on a bra even though I hate them.”
“Yeah, I’d strap up too,” Blakely says. “I think that’s a great way to approach it.”
I look at Penny, the mother of the group. She sips her coffee and then says, “I approve.”
“Okay.” I nod and let out a deep breath. “Then I shall tell her she’s making me hard.”
“Great.” Penny looks around. “Are we done here?”
Chapter Nine
WYLIE
Sandie:I can’t believe he added a scarf to the outfit.
Wylie:It took everything in me not to burst out in laughter.
Sandie:Oh girl, erotic torture is in full swing.
Wylie:Yup. He has no idea how to handle it, and I’m loving every second of it.
Knock. Knock.
