Page 106 of So This Is War
The first thing I’d like to note about this book is that the Arial font is quite pleasing to the eye, so I’m not mad about that.
I kind of wish there were more pictures, but I made her rewrite the whole thing so howcanI be mad about that?
I flip through the first few pages, taking it in. How did she type all this in a few days? She must have magic Mavis Beaconfingers that fly across the keyboard at 100 words per minute. I mean look at this, all lined up and . . .
I glance down at the words.
Wait a second.
I flip to the first page and read the first paragraph, then flip back to the page I was just at. It’s the same. The same paragraph. I flip through some more pages, and lo and behold, it’s the same thing. Over and over again.
“Son of a bitch,” I mutter as I slam the Vermont book shut. And here I was, ready to educate myself on the country’s maple candy capital.
How dare she?
Why would she do that?
She knew I’d read it.
Or did she . . .
I pull out my phone and because I’m hooked up to the Wi-Fi on the plane, I can send text messages, so I go to the queens.
Levi:Red alert! A lot has happened in the last twenty-four hours, and I need my ladies.
I pop a few pretzels in my mouth and wait for a response while I sift through the book. At least she had the decency to change up the pictures, but . . . oh my God. I bring the book closer. One of the pictures has a watermark on it from Shutterstock. She didn’t even have the decency to pay for the freaking picture.
The audacity.
My phone buzzes with a text.
Winnie:The queens are here, or at least I am. What’s going on?
Levi:So many things. Let’s start with how she walked in on me last night while I was pleasuring myself.
Ollie:That’s hot.
Blakely:OMG, did she see your tattooed wiener?
Penny:Ew, did she see your O face?
Levi:For the record, I have a nice O face. I saw it in a mirror once and congratulated myself on a dignified and respectable way to experience an orgasm. Second, no, she did not see my wiener, everything was covered up. And third, it was really fucking hot and the minute she left I came on my stomach.
Penny:The coming on the stomach is not a detail we needed.
Ollie:I love it when Silas comes on his stomach, seeing it across his abs. Yes, chef’s kiss.
Blakely:*raises hand* I like it too.
Winnie:I shall not say if I like it or not since my man’s sister is in this text thread.
Penny:Thank you, Winnie. And yes, I like it as well, but I don’t want to picture Posey with cum on his stomach.
Levi:What is your problem with me? You have some sort of aversion to thinking of me in a sexual way. Is it the bologna?
Penny:Yes, and because you’re just . . . Posey.
Winnie:Perfect way to describe him.
