Page 5 of Bourbon Truths
Knowing Jett never showed an ounce of feelings, I had to man up and be there for him. He would do the same thing for me, even though we had a silent understanding that we never explored our feelings with each other.
“Damn, I’m sorry, man,” was all I could think to say.
“Me too,” Jett agreed. He took a deep breath and said, “I just wish I could have done more for her. I wish I’d had more control over the situation. I hate not having control.”
“I can understand that,” I said lamely. Digging deep, I continued, “I need control too. I need control over everything. I think that’s why I trained myself for all those years and why it took so long for me to hand over my future to a trainer. Without control, I feel lost, almost confused.”
“Exactly,” Jett said, pulling a little harder on his hair. “I feel anxious, like I can’t breathe.”
“Like someone is sitting on your chest, clouding your thoughts and ripping your very instincts out from under you,” I added.
“Do you think I could have saved her?” Jett asked softly.
Wanting to sound as sincere as possible, I cleared my throat and placed a hand on his shoulder. “No, Jett, I don’t think you could have. I think you gave your mom a loving end to her life. She left on a good note, on a happy note. That is something you should focus on, not the other side of things, because if you focus too much on what you could have done, you will just drive yourself to an early death. It’s not healthy.”
Jett nodded as he looked at his empty bottle. Taking a deep breath, he sat up and chanced a glance at me. “Shit, things just got profound.” He chuckled.
Knowing I could easily make a sarcastic comment, I decided not to and agreed with him. “They did, but don’t ever think you can’t talk to me. I know I can be an emotional void at times, but I’m here for you, man. Always will be.”
“I appreciate that,” Jett said, getting out of his chair. He took a look at his watch and let out a long breath. “I guess I’ll be heading back to my place.”
“You can stay if you want.” I shrugged, not caring either way.
“Nah, I think it’s about time we put this little live-in situation we’ve got going on, on the back burner. I think it’s about time we both get some pussy.”
“Speak for yourself.” I winked.
A slow smile crept across Jett’s face. “Bullshit. When?”
“Locker room,” I said with pride.
“From who, Jono?”
“Fuck no!” I said, laughing. “One of the ring girls.”
“Catch her name this time?” Jett asked, shrugging into his jacket.
“Not quite.”
“Classic Kace.” Jett shook his head. With a serious look on his face, he added, “Seriously though, I’m proud of you, Kace. You’ve come a long way. You can only go up from here.”
“I hope so,” I said with a smile.
I had a house, I had a job, I had a purpose and a goal to maintain. My life was just beginning, and I couldn’t be more excited about what my future held for me.
Chapter Three
My Present…
Right hook, left hook, upper cut, upper cut.
Right hook, left hook, upper cut, upper cut.
The vibration from hitting the bag in front of me ran through my body as I continuously tried to knock out the bag swinging from side to side. I repeated the cycle over and over in my head at a rapid pace, my arms flying at an uncontrollable rate until I couldn’t breathe anymore.
Sweat dripped off my face, burning into my eyes, fogging my vision, but I didn’t let it or my shortness of breath stop me. I continued to smoke the bag, to take out my frustration, to help forget. I was always trying to forget.
Right hook, left hook, upper cut, upper cut.
