Page 69 of The Downside of Love
It would weaken me, give me false hope, make me believe that this woman who’s stolen my heart actually belongs with me.
My brain is telling me all the right things, reminding me to back off; and yet, my heart is controlling the movement of my body as I climb into her bed.
I lie there, stiffly on my back, staring at the ceiling, unable to move, not trusting myself. I will admit this, her mattress is a welcome cushion compared to the air mattress and pullout sofa I’ve been sleeping on. My back melts into the foam top, and I think this could work if I lie here like this, but when Rory backs into me, I think she has different plans.
Reaching behind her, she grabs my arm and pulls it over her body, causing me to shift so I’m spooning her.
“Yes, perfect,” she murmurs, yanking on my arm even more so I scoot in closer.
Fuck. Her ass presses against my crotch, her hair tickles my chin, and she drapes my hand over her small waist where her shirt is lifted what I can imagine is only an inch. The only way I know is because my thumb lands on the small exposed patch of skin.
I suck in a sharp breath and will myself to think of anything but my dream girl snuggling in close to me, but it doesn’t work. Nothing comes to my mind. Instead, I inhale the honey scent of her shampoo, I notice how she fits perfectly against me, and I marvel in the feel of her breath synchronizing with mine.
In and out.
In and out.
This is perfect.
Everything about this moment is perfect.
The world around us fades, all my worries and walls drift away, leaving me alone with Rory. I’ve thought of moments like this before, what it would feel like to be the man who ends the day with her, the man who protects her at night, the man who wakes with her in the morning. I’ve imagined it over and over again, and even though I tried to play it out several times, it never compared to this.
Being a greedy bastard with no will to stop, I move my thumb over that small patch of skin. When she doesn’t move, I repeat the stroke, reveling in her smooth skin.
She shifts against me, and I pause my thumb as her hand glides down my arm to my hand where she lifts it off her body.
Shit. Embarrassment fills me just as she moves my hand up and under her shirt so it’s splayed over her stomach.
I still.
My skin prickling with awareness, my mind whirling a mile a minute, I try to understand what she wants, try to comprehend my next move. My heart beats so erratically that I truly think I might have a heart attack.
This is the girl who stole my heart, the girl I never thought would look at me as anything other than another man’s friend. And yet, here I am, pressed against her, my hand firmly planted on her stomach, my nose slowly rubbing the back of her head.
She presses her ass into my growing erection. Unable to hold back any longer, intimacy takes over, igniting a flame within me.
Moving my mouth so it’s near her ear, I begin moving my thumb over her skin. She hums from the touch and moves her hand to the back of my neck where she grips me tightly.
Shit. Is this real right now? Is this really happening?
Wanting to make sure she’s awake and I’m not taking advantage of a sleeping woman, I quietly whisper, “What’s going on, Rory?”
She shifts her body against my erection, her ass rubbing the tip in just the right spot to make me clench my jaw down hard, my hand moving up her stomach to her ribcage.
“Rory,” I grit out, a light sheen of sweat spreading across my body.
Beneath me, she spins to her back so I’m looking down at her wide-open and heady eyes.
The air catches in my lungs when I get a good look at her, a turn up in her mouth, fluttering eyelashes, wet lips.
“Stryder.”
“Wh-what?” My voice catches in my throat, the electricity between us so real I feel unsure of anything right now.
Is she going to tell me to leave? Was she partially asleep during this and now realizes what just happened?
I try to read her expression, try to gauge where this is coming from, but the room is too dark to fully understand what she might be feeling. Why is she so silent, just staring up at me?
