Page 84 of I Used to be Fun
Jess shook her head at it. “It’s nice, but not quite what I’m looking for.”
“So, you’re going to be a professional organizer then.”
“No, not quite. It’s bigger than just rearranging people’s stuff. I’m going to be a Life Organization Coach.”
“A what?”
“It’s a title that Rachael and I made up.”
“And you can make money on a job you invented?”
“You can nowadays. Thank you, internet,” Jessica said, swiping through a rack of flowery dresses. “Basically, I’m going to start by making videos teaching people how to organize their lives—everything from meal planning to house maintenance schedules to financial stuff. Of course, I’ll help people tame their clutter as well.”
“Okay,” her mom said. “So people watch the videos, then hire you?”
“Some will. Most won’t, but that’s okay because if I can get enough people watching them, I’ll make money on ads.” Jess felt that little thrill bubble up in her chest again. “The ones who do hire me will be local, unless they want to pay me crazy big dollars, then I’ll travel to them. But thebigproduct I’ll be selling is an organization system that I’m creating. It’s an add-on to a person’s online calendar that will tell them when they have to do all the important stuff that we tend to forget about. You know, like cleaning out the gutters or starting your Christmas shopping. It’ll be fully customizable, so it fits each person’s life—apartment-dwellers versus single family homeowners, college student versus married with children. And the best part is, they can adjust it for different phases of their lives.”
“Wow, sweetie, that sounds wonderful,” Hilary said.
Jess could tell she didn’t quite understand the concept, but, like the supportive mom that she was, she was going to pretend.
“Thanks! I think it’s pretty genius, if I do say so myself.” Jess selected a long, flowy boho skirt and pulled it off the rack to look at it, then put it back. “It’s funny, I actually had the idea when I was spending time with my study group and hearing all their stories about how stressed out they were and how they hadn’t learned how to be adults. I just didn’t realize it was something marketable at the time. It’s going to take a ton of time to get the app set up, and I’ll have to hire someone for the tech side of it, but I have a very good feeling that it’s going to be a huge success. Or at least, a moderate success. I’ll take that too.”
Jessica’s mom held up a two-piece sheath dress with a navy jacket that had three-quarter-length sleeves. It had an understated glamour to it that drew Jess in. “Yes, that one. Anyway, I’m going to take it slow this time. I’ll stay on at the firm while I get things up and running. That’ll give Aaron time to find someone. I’m also going to take a night class at the college. It’s for people like me who already know what kind of business they want to set up, and just need someone to walk them through the steps. I’m determined to get this right.”
Hilary beamed at her daughter. “You will. There’s no doubt in my mind about that.”
“Aww, thanks, Mom.”
They walked to the dressing rooms at the back of the store, and Jess stepped into a booth.
“What does Mike think about this whole thing?” Hilary asked.
“He’s super excited about it too. He’s been coming up with a few ideas for the app, actually. Stuff he’d want if he were a client,” Jess said, tugging her shirt over her head and tossing it on the stool.
“That’s what I love to hear. My daughter and her husband working together.”
“Yes, it’s wonderful.” Jess let out a happy sigh, thinking about how good things were between them lately. She felt closer to him than she had in years, and she knew it had a lot to do with her finally feeling good again. She no longer felt slightly separated from her family. She had re-engaged with them, with herself, and with the world around her. She was out there living a big, juicy life, even though from the outside, it didn’t look all that different just yet. Jess was different. She could see the beauty in her ordinary life again. And when she looked in the mirror just then, she saw the beauty in herself.
She came out of the dressing room and did a little spin for her mom.
“You’re gorgeous.”
Instead of sloughing off the compliment and telling Hilary shehadto say that because she was her mom, Jess just smiled. “Thanks, Mom. I’m going to buy it.”
“Thank God, because I can smell Cinnabon from here and if we don’t go there soon, I’m going to lose it.”
A couple of hours later, Jess dropped her mom at her house and started for home. She flipped radio stations until she heard “Roar” by Katy Perry. She turned it up and belted out the words, not caring if people in passing cars noticed. She was happy. And she wasn’t about to hide it. But more than being happy, Jess finally had come to understand that she was enough. Just as she was. And she always had been.
* * *
Two Years Later – Real Journal Entry
December 30
This is not a fantasy. I repeat. Not a fantasy. This is actually happening. I’m at the Grand Wailea Resort in Maui, lying on a pool-side chaise longue with Mike next to me. It’s a beautiful, sunny day and we’re sipping piña coladas while Winnie and Noah are playing volleyball in the pool with some of the other hotel guests. We’re on a celebratory trip because I sold my app to Google for four million dollars. I’m wearing a sleek black tankini with lots of ruching that makes me look about ten pounds lighter. My toenails are painted the most adorable shade of coral and my feet are soft and smooth, having just had a pedicure in the hotel’s spa.
I’m taking the next two months off, but then I’ll be back to work again on my next venture. Mike is retired from the accounting firm and is coming to work with me. We have never been happier or more carefree in our entire lives. I’m doing work that feels important. I’m helping people. I am respected. I’m living that big, juicy life Betty told me about. The future ahead is bright and warm and wonderful. I’m going to go from dream to dream. And not only am I grateful, I’m really frigging fun.
