Page 47 of Eleanor & Grey
That was the very minute I knew I loved him—when I was brokenhearted at four in the morning and he still showed up for me.
Even though he hadn’t said it, I was certain he loved me too. People didn’t have to talk about love to know it existed. Love wasn’t only real because someone said it out loud. No, love just kind of sat there quietly, in the shadows of the night, healing the cracks that lived in our hearts.
18Eleanor
Dad hadn’t left his room in days.
I’d lost track of how many times I’d checked on him just to make sure he was remembering to breathe. Camila and Shay came down to help with the funeral service, and I was thankful for that. Without my aunt, nothing would’ve gotten done.
Shay stayed by my side day and night. She made sure I was eating, even though I didn’t want to, and she’d check on Dad for me when it was too hard for me to see him like that.
There was a bottle of whiskey that sat on his nightstand, and each time I looked in, more of it was gone. He was self-destructing, and I didn’t know how to help bring him back to life.
Truth was, the only person able to keep my father grounded was now gone.
The love of his life had left his side, and he didn’t have a clue how to live in a world where she no longer resided.
There was no Kevin without a Paige.
There was an eerie quietness that filled our house, an uneasy feeling over everything. So at night, I’d go stand by the water and listen to the waves crashing against the shore.
That was where I felt her most—near the water. It was as if somehow she’d cheated death and landed within the waves.
On the day of the funeral, I walked by to see Camila forcing Dad out of bed. “There’s going to be a lot of days when you are down, Kevin,” she assured him, “but not today. Today you have to get up.”
Somehow, she convinced him to get out of bed and to get dressed. I was thankful for that.
It wasn’t a big funeral, just the four of us. The service took place right there on the beach near the water.
It was what Mom had wanted, a celebration near the waves.
As I stood in the sand, my chest tightened when I saw a certain boy walking my way. The closer Greyson grew, the more confused I felt.
“Hi, Ellie,” he said with the saddest eyes ever.
“What are you...” I glanced over my shoulder toward Shay, and she gave me a smile that was meant to reassure. I looked back to Greyson. “What are you doing here?”
He gave me that small smile I’d missed so much and shrugged a shoulder. “You would be shocked by how easy it is to book a plane ticket with your parents’ credit card. Sorry I’m late. My taxi driver got lost.”
I leaped into his arms without any thought. Without hesitation. Without words.
Luckily, he didn’t need words. He wrapped me in his arms and held me tight.
“I’m so sorry,” he whispered. “She was the best.”
Yes, she was.
We walked over to the shore right as the ceremony was about to begin. In my left hand was Shay’s hand, and in my right, Greyson’s. Every time my body began to shake, they kept me steady. My stare stayed on Dad the whole time, but he didn’t look at me. He hadn’t looked at me in days. I tried not to think too much about it.
I knew he was hurting, and I knew I had Mom’s eyes. I could hardly look at myself in a mirror without tearing up.
Afterward, we were given Mom’s ashes, and we took theurn inside and set it on top of the mantel. That was where it’d stay until we figured out where to spread the ashes.
I sneaked off to my bedroom to get a breath of air, and it didn’t take long for Greyson to find me.
“Are you OK?” he asked, standing in the doorway.
“No, not really.”
