Page 28 of Shades of Loyalty
Then again, I’m sex starved. Of course, I’m going to want to fuck the first woman I meet after months who’s not taken. Fuck this.
We both stand there in silence as she reads through a few pages, stopping at one specific page I know too well. I’ve been obsessed with this page when I was younger. I still can’t tell, why. I felt humiliated. Weak. Stupid. Until I got better than anybody else and got declared boss. Ever since then, I stopped giving any fucks about these old records.
"You got shot at age 18?" she asks, slowly looking up at me in disbelief. Or is it something else?
I can’t tell exactly which emotion is painted on her face, but it’s not a happy one. Perhaps a mixture of worry and frustration?
"I got trained from early on. Not a big deal," I explain. "People learn from their mistakes." Just like I did. This record was why I started to take my father’s training as serious as I’ve never did before.
"They might learn. But you could’ve died. Just like…" She stops talking before she says it, but I know she’s talking about Roy. Her hands tremble as she closes the folder. Without another word, she puts it back onto the bookshelf. I’m glad she didn’t look deeper into it.
The number of wounds and fights I got into before I finally truly realized I had to get better… Let’s just say, it’s a lot. And I fucking hate myself for it.
Besides, it’s not that I’m proud of it. But hey, I’m still very much alive, and many people fear me. I could not feel better.
Except for the situation with Yuri’s men. I still haven’t talked to him about Roy’s death. I wonder if he has seen my mail and decided to ignore me, or if he simply hasn’t seen it yet. Regardless, I asked him to call me asap. And he fucking didn’t. But well.
I’ll manage whatever comes my way. And if it starts a family war, then fuck it. I’ll win anyway.
"Anything else you want to know before you start working for me?" My question hangs in the air for a while as she looks at the boxes of bandages.
"Of course..." she grumbles. "These bandages are the worst. They rip off fast, they don’t even work well, and—"
"We’ll replace them with bandages of your choice," I answer immediately.
A satisfied smile appears on her lips as she turns to see me. "Great, thanks, Daniel.”
It’s so easy to satisfy her. For now, at least. Money isn’t a huge deal for us. And if she needs the equipment, she’ll get it. My people’s health is important to me, anyway. And if it’s all she’s asking for, then fuck, so be it. I’ll get her anything she desires.
However, if she asks me to let her go… That, we can’t manage so well. I doubt she will. Her job here pays her so much more, and the working hours are much more relaxing. More breaks. More time to spend with her daughter. She’s closer to Loyola beach.
I doubt she’s gonna want to leave. I won’t give her any reason to. As soon as I know I can trust her, I’m going to let her start leaving the mansion. Even alone. And as soon as she signs an NDA and we both have a perfect trusting bond, fuck it, she can go as soon as she pleases. But just… Not now. Not yet. We’re gonna have to wait until things calm down. Untilshecalms down, more precisely.
"I’m sure you’ll be a great doctor," I praise her. She simply giggles. My body relaxes at the sound for some reason. She’s loosening up in my presence, and it’s the most satisfying thing I’ve felt in a while now.
"First of all, I’m a nurse. I’m not a doctor. I didn’t really have the resources to study enough for that.”
"That doesn’t matter to me. Yesterday, you seemed like you did a good job. It seemed like you were very experienced."
Her smile slowly fades. "If you think so. Thanks?" It’s not appreciation. It’s a question.
I sigh. God, I have to stop mentioning it… But it’s stuck in my head. I really should call Yuri. We have to talk about this shit.
Although I don’t intend to, I decide to walk up to her and simply pull her into a gentle hug, my arms wrapped around her warm body. I hate myself for thinking about it, but when my hands slide down her curves, all I can thinkabout is how I want to touch her, appreciate her, treat her like a goddess.
It’s the first time I’ve touched any woman in months. And it’s also the first time we’re doing more than just holding hands, and it’s fucking beautiful. I wish I could hold her like this forever. Just us. No pain, no whatever the fuck happened yesterday morning—just gentle, soft touches.
Holding her against me, slowly patting her head while she sighs exhaustively into my chest feels so heavenly. I’ve done this before with my sister. The hugging thing.
But this hugging thing between us? Fuck, it’s so much more. I hate myself for the fact that my hands stay on her waist, letting her breathe into my chest. It feels like heaven. As if I don’t ever want to let her go. I want to make her mine. Protect her and comfort her whenever she needs it. Fuck, what the hell is wrong with me?
I don’t know what this woman is doing to me, but after only a day of knowing her, the urge to hold her and comfort her simply overtook me.
And I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel anything when my hands slid down her waist, admiring her curves. She’s like sin, yet she feels like heaven.
"You did your best," I coo. "It wasn’t your fault, alright? I need you to remember this, always. None of what happened was your fault. You did so well, okay? I’m so proud of you, pretty.”
She nods against my chest slowly, just seconds before I hear a faint sob, followed by the hot tears soaking my shirt. I don’t mind it, though. It really doesn’t bother me at all. She needs this. I know she does. And I’ll gladly give it to her.
