Page 15 of Deserving Lara
Henley chuckled softly. “You thought I was going to reprimand you for that? No way. That asshole might’ve thought he was torturing you more by drugging you, by making you compliant, but he was actually doing you a favor.”
“But it made it easier for him to touch me,” Lara insisted.
“Yes, but it also allowed you to disassociate. If he knew that you weren’t listening to him, that you barely knew what was going on, would it have pissed him off?”
Lara nodded without hesitation. “I learned to moan when he squeezed my boobs or pinched me…which he did often, because he liked to see his marks on me. When I didn’t react at all, he hurt me worse.”
“Exactly,” Henley said. “Listen to me, Lara. You might think that you were completely at his mercy, but in reality, you were controlling that situation as much as you could at the time. You figured out what you needed to do in order to stay alive. Yououtsmartedhim. I hope this doesn’t freak you out…but I read the report you gave to the police. You said that he claimed you were his favorite, right?”
Lara shivered but nodded.
“Then he’s an idiot. Because he thought he had you completely under his thumb, but in reality, you were playing a part. I have no doubt whatsoever that if our guys hadn’t gotten there, you would’ve found a way to escape on your own eventually.”
Lara shook her head.
“Yes, you would’ve. You weren’t restrained anymore, were you?”
Lara stared at Henley, saying nothing.
“I bet even though you were drugged, you were already thinking about ways to escape. Maybe even about grabbing his dick while he was jacking off and hurting him.”
Lara swallowed hard. “He would’ve hurt me even more if I’d tried anything.”
“Probably. But that’s why you were waiting. Until his guard was down completely. So you would be sure to get away.”
Lara’s heart was beating fast again, but not because she was panicking. How did Henley know what she’d been planning? She was mostly out of it from the drugs when she was found. Passed out before they’d gotten to that helicopter. And she hadn’t toldanyonewhat she’d been thinking, planning. Not the cops, not Owl. Definitely not the woman sitting across from her.
“I see you, Lara Osler. Cora says that you were the nice one in your friendship.” Henley smiled again. “That you were polite and quiet. But I see the fire behind your eyes. The determination. Being nice doesn’t mean you’re not willing to help yourself when the shit hits the fan.”
“I woke up one evening,” Lara said quietly. “He was late in coming to visit me. I don’t know why. But that meant the drugs he’d given me earlier in the day had worn off more than usual. I wasn’t tied down, but I’d been there long enough to know I wasn’t going to be able to walk out of that basement. The door was locked and the window was too high and small for me to use to escape. But I got out of bed and walked around anyway.
“In the bathroom, under the sink, I found a piece of metal. It was almost a foot long, sharp at one end, and kind of jagged and rough along one side. I don’t know what it was for or why it was there…but I took it. Hid it under the mattress. I thought about doing pretty much what you said. Thought maybe when he was masturbating, I’d cut his dick off.
“He never closed the door when he was there. I think he got off on the possibility that a member of the staff might catch him in the act of tormenting me. Or the idea that Ridge could come downstairs at any time and see exactly what he was doing. I mean…Ridge just handed me over to Carter willingly, so I doubt he cared. He was too busy spending my money to worry about what I was going through. Anyway…the door remained open. And I was scared; wasn’t sure I’d ever actually use that piece of metal. But I thought about it a lot.”
“You aren’t helpless, Lara. Not even close. No, you weren’t as strong as your captor and he was able to overpower you. But that doesn’t mean you were going to be his victim forever. Waiting for the perfect moment to make your move is smart. You didn’t ask to be violated. You didn’t do anything to deserve to be in that situation. Sometimes life is simply unfair. You can only hope to have the strength to endure, and when the time is right, rise up and overcome the odds.”
Lara pressed her lips together. Henley’s words echoed in her brain.
You didn’t ask to be violated.
You didn’t do anything to deserve to be in that situation.
No, she didn’t. All she was guilty of was wanting to be loved. Of wanting to please Ridge. That didn’t warrant what happened to her.
And…shehadn’tjust lain there on that bed, resigned to her fate. No, she’d been talking herself into cutting off Carter’s dick and getting the hell out of there.
“I think on that note, we’ll stop for today. This goes without saying, but I’m going to say it anyway…anything we talk about in here, stays in here. And I want to be your friend, Lara, not just your therapist. But if you aren’t comfortable with that, it’s okay.”
Lara hadn’t been so sure that talking to a therapist would do a damn thing. She certainly didn’t think it would make her feel safer—after all, Carter Grant was still out there and probably making plans to get her—but surprisingly, she did feelbetter.
“I’d like to be your friend too,” she told Henley.
The smile on the other woman’s face made Lara feel good. Really good.
“Great. How about we go raid Robert’s stash of Christmas Tree Cakes?”
Lara frowned. “What?”
