Page 32 of Deserving Lara
In response, he looked at Lara.
She loved how attentive he was to her. But she also felt guilty. Because she hadn’t been able to let Owl out of her sight,hehadn’t been able to do a lot of the stuff around The Refuge that he usually did. She didn’t like that she’d been the reason the others had to take up the slack.
“It’s fine. I want to finalize some of our plans for the kids with Cora after lunch. We can stay here in one of the conference rooms and talk after we eat…if that’s all right,” Lara said, looking at Cora.
“It’s perfect, actually. I had some questions about how much time some of the activities might take, so we can work on the timeline for each day and figure out who will work with which age groups, and how we want to break up the activities,” Cora replied.
That decided, Pipe hugged Cora, and Owl shifted Lara a little farther away.
“You sure you’re good with this? I can stay around the lodge if you need me to.”
“I know, and I appreciate it more than I can say. What you said earlier…you know…” She glanced down at his hands. “It helped. A lot.”
“Good. Both Pipe and I will have our phones with us if you need anything. Don’t hesitate to reach out.”
“I won’t.”
They stared at each other for an awkward second or two before Owl smiled. He reached for her hand and squeezed it, then headed for the door with Pipe.
For a moment, Lara thought he was going to kiss her. She even leaned forward a little in anticipation.
She definitely needed to talk to Cora, and maybe the others too. The conversation might be embarrassing, but she needed advice. Man advice.
CHAPTERSEVEN
Fifteen minutes later, Alaska, Henley, Reese, Cora, and Lara were sitting around a table in the kitchen, stuffing their faces with the sandwiches, sliced veggies, and cookies that Robert was preparing for The Refuge guests. He’d grumbled about them barging into his kitchen and demanding food before it was ready to be served, even while quickly accommodating them.
“You look…good,” Alaska told Lara a little hesitantly once they were all seated.
“I actually feel good today,” Lara said. “And I feel like I need to apologize to you guys. I—”
“No,” Reese and Henley said at the same time.
Henley reached out and put her hand on Lara’s arm for a moment before sitting back. “You really don’t. First, because we all get it. Seriously, we do. And second, because you’ve done only what you’ve needed to heal. And no one here is ever going to accept an apology for you doing what you need to do. We understand.”
Alaska leaned forward and pinned Lara with her gaze. “Small spaces,” she said quietly. “I never used to mind them, but there are days when I break out in a sweat simply thinking about opening a closet. A freakingcloset! It’s stupid. It’s ridiculous. And yet, sometimes my brain goes back…there. And it’s just too much. But you know what? I’ve learned when I have those bad days to cut myself some slack. I went through hell and was lucky to come out on the other side. I know it, Drake knows it, and everyone here knows it. There’s no judging here, Lara. None.”
“I have some mornings when I don’t feel as if I can let Jasna get out of my car when I drop her off at school,” Henley added. “Like, I literally want to grab hold of her arm, jerk her back into the seat, and drive away like a bat out of hell. Her being taken was so hard because I had zero control. And itsucked. But then I look at her beautiful smile and realize how amazing and happy and whole she is. She isn’t afraid of the world, even after being kidnapped, and I’m so very thankful for that.”
“And it pisses me off,” Reese said with an adorable wrinkle of her nose, “but I have no desire to ever travel again. I went down to South America by myself and didn’t think twice about it. But now? Nope. I’m officially a homebody.”
Cora shrugged when the others looked at her. “I was scared,” she admitted. “But I was held against my will for like, an hour or whatever. Most of my fear comes from thinking of the people I loved getting hurt. That means you, Lara. And Pipe. And all of you guys. I’m still waiting for the moment when you all come to your senses and wonder what the hell you were thinking, being my friend, but in the meantime I’m going to enjoy the hell out of finally being a part of the popular crowd.”
“First of all, we are anythingbutthe popular crowd,” Alaska said with a small snort. “But none of us care. And secondly…you’re stuck with us, Cora. There’s nothing wrong with you. Nothing at all.”
Everyone murmured their agreement.
Henley turned back to Lara. “So, you see? We all have fears and things we struggle to overcome. And that’s justus. I won’t even get into our men. Or every single guest who comes to The Refuge. And if you’re thinking for one second that any of us will hold your actions against you, you need to learn to stop. In fact, I’ll go so far as to say I think you’re doing an amazing job. It wasn’t too long ago when this,” she gestured around the table, “would have been impossible for you. So celebrate the small wins, Lara. Will there be setbacks? Of course. But that’s a part of healing.”
“I’m proud of you,” Cora said, emotion making her words gruff.
“Me too,” Reese echoed.
“Me three,” Alaska said with a smile.
“Me four,” Henley agreed.
“Right,” Lara said, struggling for a moment to contain her emotions. “So…I have a question, but I’m not sure how to ask,” she blurted.
