Page 9 of Ramshackle
“Pathetic.” He grabs my hair at the roots, twisting it back and yanking hard so I’m forced to look up, eliciting a cry from my lips when the pain snaps me completely awake.
Gordon’s scowling at me. “You need to do better than this. Consider today your orientation and practice run. If you fail me like this tomorrow, Holt will shock you awake every time youpass out until you finish the job.” He shoves my face down into the sand and then clicks the collar back around my neck.
Footsteps peter away, but I don’t bother raising my head to confirm that he’s leaving. I know he’s done with me today, and it’s better for me to keep my head down until he’s out of sight than look at him where he could misinterpret it as some act of defiance.
I move my forehead onto my arm and take a shuddering inhale. It’s like my entire body has been sliced open and filled with sand. Heavy. Burning.
You can do this,I tell myself, even as my body screams otherwise. This is just day one, and I’ve already seen how it gets worse.
But I survived before.
And I’ll do it again.
Chapter three
Jackson
I can almost feelmyself rising into consciousness out of oblivion. My last memories play before me like on a movie screen, and I watch it with rapt attention.
The island.
Thorne.
Escaping with Raegan.
My little one.
My mind is conscious, but it’s taking longer for it to connect with my body. I urge it awake, seeking any sign of my physical body so that I can move enough to fully rouse myself.
There’s a painful twisting in my chest as I think about where my little one is and what she’s dealing with at this very moment while I’m not there for her.
Finally, I’m able to drag my eyelids open. My entire body feels heavy and sluggish. And itaches. I should expect pain after the fight with Thorne. Far more actually, but my aches seem to bemore related to stiffness all over rather than centralized on my back.
Above me is a white ceiling. I turn my head to the side, noting the pillow beneath it, to find Aiden sitting in a chair, watching me. He’s wearing a suit, as usual, but the shirt’s unbuttoned and rumpled. The rest of him doesn’t sound any alarms until I see the exhaustion written in the furrow of his brow and the tiredness of his eyes.
“Before you say or do anything, I need you to make our conversation here private,” he murmurs.
My gaze slides to the door of my room, where Kellan is leaning against it with his arms crossed over his chest. His expression is shadowed and tight, and when I try to make eye contact, he dodges it by turning his head.
I force myself upright, shucking the blankets that are surprisingly still on me—instead of tangled around me like usual—and turning my back against the wall so I can see them clearly. My fingers twitch when I realize I’m in nothing but boxers and I don’t have my knives within reach.
“Where is she?”
The fact that they’re both here and she isn’t is telling enough.
“If you want that answer, then do as I ask first. Then I’ll tell you everything.”
I do it without further prompting and give him a firm nod. I’m ordinarily quite patient. I can wait forever for something to be just right before I make my move. But with her? I’ve never felt the crawling need burrowed under my skin tomovebefore. To find her. To hold her. To fuck her until there’s no doubt in my mind that she’s with me and she’s safe.
Aiden clears his throat. “Gordon has her.”
I don’t react. Not outwardly, at least. I expected it was bad. And I could lose myself to the rage, or I can save it, store it up forGordon or anyone else who stands in my way. If there’s anyone to blame for losing her, it’s me.
I got her involved in my plan with Thorne. I let her stubbornness win in coming to the island when she should have stayed behind. I wasn’t strong enough to protect her after fighting only one man.
I know it.
And they know it, too.
