Page 16 of Ramshackle
My heart pounds, which is now the only thing freely able to move after I test every other body part. Even my head is restricted. I’m stuck in this position, floating half in and half out of water, in pitch-black silence.
I close my eyes and take a deep breath.
This isn’t so bad if I stop worrying about how vulnerable I am right now.
I continue with calming breaths as I begin to drift in and out of consciousness. It feels like my mind is floating in space, cocooned in a cloud. I have no body. Just my mind. And it feels freeing. Weightless.
I drift off for a bit and then Gordon’s voice is suddenly clear as day in my head.
“You’re a monster. A danger to everyone around you.”
My eyes fly open, but there’s still nothing and no one to see. I’m alone here.
“It would be better for you to be alone.”
I remember Holt sticking something in my ears. I thought it had been to keep the water out, but it must also have some sort of Bluetooth or recording in it of Gordon’s voice.
Shut up, my mind tells him.
“How many people have to be hurt before you realize that you’re too dangerous to be around them? That girl you chased after? Vera? Those boys you think who still care about you? They don’t, you know.”
My chest tightens at his words.
They do!Well, maybe not all of them. But Kellan and Jackson care about me. And Dane…we just started working things out.
“All they ever wanted was to make their family whole again. And now they have that. They’ve forgotten all about you now that Vera is with them. They don’tneedyou anymore.”
That’s…not true.
But…I was the one who broke our family. I’m the one who betrayed them. Now that they have her again…are they happier? Are they better off?
“No one needs you. Not your dead mother. Not your friends who only get hurt by being near you. No one.”
The water swallows any tears from my eyes before they get a chance to fall.
Stop.
“I’ve been checking up on them to make sure they are holding up their end of our bargain. They’re living happily in some firehouse. No one is looking for you. No one even cares that you’re gone. They have everything they’ve ever wanted.”
Please…I plead as if he could somehow hear my thoughts.No more.
“ButIneed you, pet. I’m theonlyperson who wants you. I can make you into something great, if you’ll only let me in. Give yourself to me completely, and you’ll want for nothing. Just obey my every wish, make sure to please me, and do whatever I command, and I will take care of you. You’ll find great rewards waiting for you. You won’t ever feel forgotten or left behind again. And together, we’ll save the world.”
I fist my hands and try to tug on my restraints, to ground myself with pain or pressure to remind me of where I am. He’s lying. I know he is. It’s what he does: lie, cheat, and manipulate.
But it doesn’t stop the sliver of doubt that slips in. It doesn’t stop me from wondering if they are all happy now that I’m gone. Now that I’m not there to cause stress within the group or mess up Aiden’s plans. Now that they have Vera again. They wouldn’t risk getting me back if it meant losing her again.
He even knows about the firehouse. How could he be lying if he knows that?
Fuck, stop it!
I’m trapped in my mind, with nothing but Gordon’s voice to keep me company for what feels like an eternity.
Chapter five
Aiden
No one cares tostay up late or hang around while Vera's here. As soon as she gets bored enough to turn in, we quickly retire to our rooms to have some privacy.
