Page 10 of Raze
Banging and muted yelling behind a door on the opposite side of the room has everyone’s attention. Gordon brings me to the door, his touch lingering on my back. “Get rid of them.” I open my mouth with a question, but he raises a finger to stop me. “Ah-ah. Whatever you need to say or do, make sure they don’t come back.”
They?My stomach drops.No…please, don’t be them.Gordon stepsback and waves at the door for me to open it. He stands behind it, so it’ll just be me and the office in the background.
I turn the doorknob as the banging intensifies. The door must be thick, because the shouting on the other side is so muted I can’t make out the words, or maybe it’s because my heart is thundering in my chest and drowning everything out.
Please, please, please, I pray silently, willing it to be anyone else behind this door.
The thumping stops once I pull the door back.
Clean up your own mess, Gordon’s words echo back to me. It can’t be anyone else.
“Rae?” Dane lowers his fist when he sees me. His confusion melts to relief, and he lunges forward to wrap me in his arms. “Fuck’s sake, Rae! Where have you been? Are you okay? Did those assholes do anything to you?”
I raise my arms in reflex to hug him back but freeze halfway up. I…can’t. This is wrong. It’s so wrong. I killed his sister. Vera…with these hands…
I look past him to see the others standing there. Jack’s head is cocked to the side as he looks at me so intensely that I’m afraid he’ll read my secret if I let him. I hurriedly look away from him to Kellan, who’s standing just a step behind Dane like he’s waiting his turn to squish me in his giant bear hug. And then Aiden, whose eyes are narrowed as he looks from the office behind me and back to me. To my raised arms that haven’t hugged Dane back yet.
My arms drop under the scrutiny and Dane pulls back when he notices.
“What’s wrong,beautiful?” Kellan pushes up next to Dane, who still hasn’t let me go yet.
“Are you hurt?” Dane demands. He looks me over and then adds, “Have you seen Vera? She’s been missing too. Is she with you?”
My pounding heart stutters and then crushes in a vise. I can’t breathe. I can’t think.
Gordon’s voice breaks through the pain and whispers,Make sure they don’t come back.
I pull myself free of Dane so there’s space between us. It doesn’t help me breathe any easier, or the pain lessen, but I can’t tell him while he’s holding me with worry. I can’t take comfort in him with what I’m about to tell him.
My chest is so tight that I’m not sure how I’ll manage words. I swallow down the tears, saving them for later. I have to do this, knowing that I’m ending everything between us. Even though I’ll keep fighting for them, I know there’s no redemption for me after what I’ve done.
“Vera’s dead.” My voice sounds hollow as the two words I wish I’d never have to say leave my lips. I don’t know why I thought I could run from this. That GE would have told them already to relieve me of this burden.
But it should be me to tell them. I did this. On my own.
I grip my pants in sweaty hands to keep from shaking. They can’t see me being weak. They have to accept this, accept that I’m the bad guy here, so that they don’t try to get me back.
All color drains from Dane’s face. “What? That’s not fucking funny, Rae.” He starts toward me, and I move back again, out of reach. “Where is she?!”
“She’s gone!” I yell back ashis panic escalates into my own.
Dane roars and lunges toward me. I flinch back, but he doesn’t touch me. When I glance up, Aiden has grabbed him by the arm to hold him back.
“You’re not going to get answers by barreling into the office,” he tells Dane. Aiden’s gaze locks with mine. “What happened?”
“I—” The words clog my throat.
Make sure they don’t come back.
Goodbye.
“I did it. I killed her.” There’s no emotion when I finally get it out. This is the end of the last seven years together. The end of all of us.
Dane’s frozen still, his eyes swimming in tears, as he stares at me in shock. “You’re lying,” he accuses, his voice rough.
Kellan curses and shakes his head, moving around Aiden and Dane to get to me, and I grab the door and use it as a barrier between us. I can’t let them touch me or I’ll break.
Aiden’s hand hits the door before I can close it. “Are you with them?”
