Page 32 of On a Pale Horse
Not that French roast would make much of a difference. Cloris offered her a smile anyway before turning to face Hades. “What do you think about this? Did you have any interaction with them?”
Hades shook his head and stared down into his own mug. “No. When the titans were confined, it was made clear no one was permitted to near their resting place. I don’t even know how the Book of the Dead would have gotten in there.”
“Another trick?” Arwan asked. “Hel is diabolical when it comes to making plans. She’s not much to look at but she is a goddess…. Would she risk the other God’s wrath to trap you guys?”
In her heart, Cloris would say yes. Absolutely. So far, she’d pretty much broken every rule, and yet, none of the other gods seem moved to do anything about her. Not even now, as Ragnarök reigned down upon them.
The only deity who, for a moment, seemed to want to fight, was Odin. And yet, maybe that was what spurred him to align with her… Witnessing the other deity’s indifference to the situation on Earth.
Usually, Cloris didn’t question her position in the universe, but right now, for once, she was tempted to curse the Gods, say fuck it, and leave them to clean up the mess that would follow if she just quit.
Simply stopped escorting souls and maybe took over Arwan’s cabin. Hades and Persephone could come with her. Charon too. They could build an addition and leave the gods to clean up their own damned messes.
And Hel was certainly a damn mess.
She sighed and folded herself over the counter. Katherine swept her coffee out of the way of Cloris’s sweeping arms. And for no reason other than it made her feel better she let out a long loud satisfying groan against the acrylic counter.
Hades skimmed his hand down the curve of her spine and thankfully said nothing. After a few seconds, she sat back up and everyone had averted their gaze to give her a few minutes to compose herself.
Cloris drew herself up and threw back her shoulders.
Katherine and Arwan leaned into each other. Leaning their foreheads together and whispered softly. Cloris wanted that. She needed that peace that all of her friends seemed to have found. But as long as she was Death, she couldn’t … there was always a soul in need, always a disturbance needing her attention, always a psychotic goddess trying to steal her boyfriend.
Boyfriend felt like too mundane a word for what Cloris felt for Hades. Taking him into her body had altered something, she loved him before, but now, every second she spent with him felt amplified, her emotions, her desires, all seemed so much fuller.
Cloris watched Katherine and Arwan entwine their fingers and continue whispering. Seeing it made her ache even more for that kind of easy affection.
She glanced back over at Hades from the corner of her eye. As always, his presence made her feel like she burned from the inside out. With a wink, he turned her on the stool to face him. She allowed it because she wanted him too much to deny him anything.
“Talk to me,” he said. “What do you think? How do you feel?”
She looked into his deep brown eyes and sighed. “I feel tired. So tired. Like it’s an ache in my bones I’ve never been able to get rid of.”
His gaze softened as he met hers before he traces the outside of her biceps with his fingers. Up and down. Up and down. It soothed her enough to lean into him, plant her forehead against his collarbone and let him bear her weight. Only for a minute. She’d rest a minute and then get back to carrying on. As always.
Hades stopped moving his hands and simply pulled her into him tighter. “I’m here,” he whispered. “I’m not going anywhere.”
It only made her ache more because she knew he wasn’t. Neither was she. Until the Earth crumbled into dust, they would exist in a loop forever bound up in the life and death of humans.
“There’s no escape,” she said. “No matter what we do, we’ll never be able to have what they have.”
Hades stiffened against her. “Who?”
She gestured at Katherine and Arwan.
An icy chill skated down her spine and she sat back to look at Hades. His eyes, only seconds ago warm and tender, had iced over.
“Hades?”
“I have to go,” he said. Deadpan. No give in his tone. He simply stood and walked toward the door.
Cloris caught his hand before he could walk out. “What’s wrong?”
He didn’t turn to face her. “It’s clear now how much you want a human life. Something you can never have with me.”
She dropped his hand and walked around so she could look at him. “It’s somethingyoucan never have withme.”
His only response was a tight purse of his lips and a shake of his head. “Every step forward we take it’s like we tumble five more back. I know you only held yourself away from me because you feared hurting me. You feared me looking at you the same as everyone else.”
