Page 47 of The Count
“Continue,” he said.
I looked back toward the building. This was the first time I’d seen him in person in a very long time. I knew if I let myself get near him, I’d want to talk to him, and then it would spiral out of my control from there. “I didn’t put him up for adoption. I found a wealthy family to take him in and raise him as their own. I paid them every year since then, and I paid for his college. Danglars always handled the payments out of my trust, never knowing what he paid into.”
I checked his profile for any signs of what to expect. Eddy, my Eddy. I finally got him back and everything is all wrapped up in betrayal and lies. Could we ever clear away enough to have a new start?
He sat very still and stared out the front window. His silence hurt. My entire body ached, for secrets yet revealed, and all I wanted to do was tell him about it. Explain more, explain better. Enough so he would understand.
After what felt like eternity, he turned to look at me. No softness in his eyes now. Nothing but hard steel and ice. The same man I met when he swept into my office the first day we met. God that hurt worse. Watching the man he’d become over the last month strip away.
“I understand,” he said.
I reached out but he pulled away.
“I understand. But I hate it. Everything about this situation disgusts me.”
For the first time since we started fighting I raised my voice. “How the hell was I supposed to know you were alive. Eddy?” I demanded. “You didn’t exactly write to me from prison. And you didn’t tell me the truth until I forced you into it.” Did he see how hypocritical he sounded punishing me for this when he sat on the same side of the criminal fence?
I pressed my hand flat to my stomach and shook my head. “And guess what, this disgusting situation is about to grow by one. So deal with that.”
Leaving him with that information, I got out of the car and walked to the curb where some taxis lined up. I directed one to take me to my office. Taylor might there. At the very least I’d be able to pay the taxi driver. In the back window, I watched him scramble out of his own car and rush after the taxi. Too late now. I turned and faced the front.
Guilt still wracked me, but all my secrets were out now. Eddy was alive. There was nothing left for me anywhere. My business dead, my home stolen, the man I love…a sob threatened to squeak out and I stifled it back with my hand against my lips.
I loved him. I’d love Eddy forever. And now, as a man, I loved him even more. He’d become beautiful, strong, empathetic. He’d grown despite his adversity, and I got to see proof of that first hand. I couldn’t regret it.
He could hate me forever. But I knew I’d always love him.
The car stopped by my building and Taylor’s brooding head poked out the door. “Boss,” he called. A smile on his face until he took a look at me. He paid the drive and carried me into the office.
Once I sat on the chair he knelt beside me and looked me over. “Are you alright? Did he hurt you. I’ll kill him myself. I don’t care what he threatened.”
I waved him back. “I need a drink.”
He brought one back immediately and I stared at it, longing for the burn which would help ease some of this mess in my brain, but then I remembered…I shook my head and handed it to him.
“What’s wrong with it?”
“Nothing. I just forgot I can’t drink.”
He stared at me, no doubt puzzled, “what?”
I pointed to my leg. “Pain killers. Bad idea.”
I wished I’d had the foresight to bring those bad boys with me right about now. Taylor wandered back to his surveillance. I called out again. “If you see Will. Don’t let him in.”
A feral smile replaced the quizzical brow dominating his forehead. “My pleasure, Boss.”
I leaned into the chair. No doubt, I was happy to home. But the hole in my chest told me I’d left something behind.
Twenty
Mercy
Istared at the report on my desk. It screamed at me to take action, do something, anything. But, how could I? After everything I’d done to him. I had no right asking to be apart of his life. He’d left his apartment, sold it, and so far, I hadn’t found a trace of him.
“Oh my fucking fuck, you’re disgusting,” a voice, said from the doorway.
I looked up at Taylor standing just inside looking at me like I’d grown a second head. “Excuse me?”
