Page 29 of Make Me Forget
I threw the towel on the low portion of the bar and turned my back to adjust bottles on the shelf. “Nope, nothingserious.”
A downright lie as Mara and I were end game as far as I was concerned. I didn’t want the gossip queen here spreading our business all over townthough.
“Oh, well, we should get a drink sometime, catchup.”
“Isn’t that what we’re doing now?” I asked, turning back to face her, all pretense of playing along nowgone.
She took another sip of her beer, slapped the counter, and slid off the stool. “Well, I’m going to get home. If you see Mara, give her my card and tell her I’d love to see her. You feel free to use it, too, if you want to dosomething.”
She flashed another smile and took off out the door. Maybe I needed to work on my peopleskills.
Billy came up to the bar for another round, and once he sauntered back to his friends, I picked up Martha’s card and pulled out my cell phone to callMara.
“Hello,” came a hazyreply.
“How are you feeling?” I couldn’t keep the laughter out of my voice. The woman had three shots, and she sounded like she spent the night on abender.
“Fine. What do you want,Wilcox?”
Downgraded to last name status.Ouch.“You had a visitor here at the bar. Martha from high school. Do you rememberher?”
“Yeah, cute chubby girl. Sicklysweet.”
The sound of rustling sheets cut through the line. “Yeah, that’s her. She said she saw you at the rehab clinic today and wanted to meet up withyou.”
“You didn’t tell her how to find me did you?” she shrieked through thephone.
“Simmer down. Of course I didn’t. I just wanted you to know she was looking foryou.”
Her voice was softer this time. “Sorry. I don’t know how much I’m ready for others to know just yet. I haven’t figured out how to tell them what happened or explainanything.”
I braced back on the liquor shelves. “You don’t have to explain yourself to anyone, nor try to put a pretty face on what happened to you. I hope you knowthat.”
“Not everyone is you, Murphy. Most won’t just accept I got shot and I’m missing a few years of memories. They always ask questions, and pry, and try to do helpful research. As if everything happened to me can be googled and explained away.” Her voice trailed off at the end. I could feel the rawness of it all, scratched deep by therapy today, through the phone. I wanted to wrap her in my arms for asecond.
“Do you want me to come overthere?”
More sheets rustling. “No, I’m fine. You need to stay with the bar. You’re the only one working tonight, and your newest employee isn’t covering for you.” She chuckled, but I could tell it was fake, a placation so I wouldn’tleave.
“Fine. I won’t come over, but I’m going to order you somefood.”
“Murphy, I can feed myself. I don’t need you to take care ofme.”
I clutched my fists and dropped my head to the wall. “Woman, don’t you get it by now? I want to take care of you. I’ve been trying to do that since you gothere.”
“I never asked you for that. I’ve been taking care of myself, amnesia and all, for over a quarter of a century. Taking care of me is not what I need fromyou.”
I covered the bottom of the phone and let out a stuttering sigh before speaking again. “What is it you want from me then? You keep talking about us and saying things like love, and yet, when I try to do something that shows you how I feel, you push meback.”
“I’m going back to sleep. I can’t talk about this now. If you want to come over tomorrow, we can talk about itthen.”
I shook the phone in my hand, trying to vent the frustration stacking in my gut like a brick wall. Damn her and her fuckingpride.
“Okay. See you then,” I managed to say and hung up before I shouted ather.
I exited to the back of the bar and tossed around a few books to make myself feel somewhat better. If only a little bit. What I wanted was to shatter glass and shake Mara until I got something through her thickhead.
When I came back out, I focused on dusting bottles and straightening things which didn’t need to be straightened. I was sure I wasn’t getting a tip from the corner as I’d gruffly handed them beers more than once now.Excellent way to stay in business,Murphy.
