Page 134 of Small Town Swoo
“It was perfect.” She was still panting. “I didn’t want to go slow. I missed you too much.”
I rolled to the side, taking her with me, our bodies still joined. Pushing her hair off her face, I rubbed her lower lip with my thumb. “I feel like I have so many things to tell you. Like I’ve been gone for months, not days.”
She smiled. “Tell me everything.”
I filled her in on all that had happened, starting with the birthday party mix-up. She listened with wide eyes—until I got to the part about sitting around with the girlswearing the shark onesie, which made her laugh so hard she cried.
“You should have heard them giving me advice on my love life,” I said. “They were so sure they had it all figured out.”
“Just like me and Mabel at that age.”
“You guys were never that bossy. They were like, ‘Just call her, just tell her you love her, just turn your life upside down in an instant. Don’t be a jerk.’”
“You weren’t a jerk,” she assured me, stroking my hair. “I never thought that. It would have been easier if you were.”
“I was so fucking miserable the next few days.”
“Me too,” she said. “I went to work, I visited my dad, I even saw Veronica, but I just felt hollowed out.”
“I’m sorry.” I kissed her lips. “I was being stubborn. I was hanging on to something that wouldn’t let me see the mistake I was making.”
“What was the something?”
“Just, like...an old fear that anything can be taken away from you at any time. So it’s better not to care about anything or anyone too deeply.”
“What made you realize it?”
I smiled. “You’re gonna laugh.”
“Is it funnier than the shark onesie?”
“It’s close. I went back to Delphine.”
Her eyes went wide. “Did you really?”
“Yes. I’d started to get pissed that I’d done all the things she said, and not only was there no big movie role, but now I had all thesefeelings. I wanted my walls back.”
Ari laughed. “What did she say?”
“She told me the universe isn’t a vending machine. You don’t put the money in, punch the number, and get theprize. But she could sense that I’d done the work. She said my heart energy was flowing freely, but I was still closing myself off out of fear.”
“So how did she get you to conquer it?”
“Somehow she opened my mind to the possibility of us. She made me picture it. She made me feel it—I’m telling you, it was some voodoo shit. But it just felt so fucking right. Sogood. I knew right then I’d do anything to have it, even risk the hurt.”
She laid her hand on my cheek. “If it were up to me, you’d never hurt again.”
“I think it’s probably unrealistic to imagine life without any pain, and there will be bad days, but knowing you’re there at the end of them will make all the difference.”
“I’ll be there,” she whispered.
“So will I.” I circled her wrist and lifted her hand from my face, kissing her palm. “I want to be in this with you, just like you said. I want to take care of you. Lift you up. Give you everything.”
“I want to work for it.” She smiled seductively. “But I will let you spoil me. You’re very good at it.”
“It will be my pleasure.” I kissed the inside of her wrist. “There’s something else.”
“What else could there be?”
