Page 137 of Law Maker
I gasped—once, twice. I wanted to scream, to call him back, to beg, but my voice wouldn’t come. I couldn’t move. I couldn’tbreathe.
“Kaia.” Alba wrapped me in her arms, and something inside me broke.
Maybe my heart.
Maybe me.
“He left me,” I sobbed as my knees gave out. “He left me like Mom. He said nunca, and he left me anyway.”
***
The only good thing about nightmares was that you always woke up. They didn’t last.
This was worse than a nightmare. I’d cried myself to sleep and would have chosen a million bad dreams over the reality waiting in daylight.
It waited. Cruel. Hopeless.
Teagan had gone to breakfast, but I couldn’t stomach food—couldn’t even swallow water. Breathing felt like effort.
Alba rubbed my back and curled up beside me. “It’ll get better. I promise.”
“I just want to know why,” I whispered, my mouth dry. “If he didn’t love me, why pretend? Why make me believe he cared? He didn’t even suggest long distance. I would’ve agreed. We could’ve traveled to see each other. Instead, he just gave up on me.”
Another sob broke free. Alba handed me a tissue from the box on my nightstand. “Maybe he thought it’d be too hard for you.”
I dabbed my swollen eyes. “He knows me better than that. We talked about his career. He swore he wanted to stay here.”
“Maybe the pressure got to him. Dad says different athletes handle it in different ways. Football isn’t racing, but I think it still applies.”
“I’d never hold him back.” I slid my hands beneath my cheek. “I’ve always wanted what’s best for him. I still do. I just thought… I thought we were meant to be.”
Alba gathered the tear-soaked tissues from my comforter. “Well, maybe he’s just an asshole. That’s the depressing possibility. I’ll get you coffee, okay? You need something to drink.”
A pang pierced my chest. She was so thoughtful, she reminded me of Asher—all the times he took care of me. His food. His hugs. The way he made me smile. Why had he left me so cruelly, so strangely?
“I’ll be back.”
Alba left, and I reached into my nightstand for my diary. I hadn’t written in days. After our first time, I’d been so happy I thought words couldn’t capture it.
Now all I had were memories.
As I traced the last note I’d written—the day Asher picked me up—pressure built behind my eyelids. Just the thought of writing abouthim made me want to cry. I slid the pink bookmark to mark the page and froze.
The door opened. Alba returned with two paper cups.
I curled my shaky fingers into a fist. “Somebody read my diary.”
She set the drinks on the nightstand quickly and sat down. “Are you sure?”
“I am. I always leave the bookmark on the last page I wrote. I’ve been doing it for years. I left it there Saturday. Today it was stuck in the back.”
Alba groaned. “Teagan. She must’ve snooped while we were away last weekend.”
As if summoned, Teagan walked in.
I held up the diary. “Do you know what this is?”
Red spread across her cheeks. Fucking traitor.
