Page 82 of Sweet Rule

She’s short and round with a bright smile on her face. Her hair is short and curled into a perm and even though I know my grandmother is nearly 80 and it’s a wash of silver and white, there’s still dark hair an identical color to mine.

“Honey?” Her voice is the way I remember it and I climb the stairs as I nod.

“Grandma?”

Her brown eyes well with tears and she comes forward faster than I thought a woman her age might move. She throws her arms around me and catches me in a tight hug.

“My girl. My sweet girl.” I feel her start to shake and I realize it’s because she’s crying. She’s so much smaller than me but she’s holding me so tightly I can barely breathe. The ache that I felt for so long finally stops.

“Grandma.”

I know I’m loved and wanted and it’s the only thing I ever wanted. I just never thought I’d find it in Texas of all places.

When we break apart she can hardly stop touching me. She’s a weeping mess and so am I. I cling to her, the comfort of the memory I made myself forget is back. It weighs down on me until I can’t believe I ever let my mother make me think it was a lie.

Agnes Vlahos is nothing like her son or my mother. When she talks about the loss of The Promised Land she’s sad and her eyes brim with tears, but she doesn’t blame anyone.

“It was just one of those things. We couldn’t help it or stop it.”

She’s warm and kind, loving to a fault. She’s everything I ever wanted in my family and I spend the afternoon drinking it up. She shows Law and I pictures of the rose farm and shows me a whole picture album of family I didn’t know existed. She’s excited as she makes calls, telling the uncles and aunts and cousins I didn’t know I had that they will meet me the next day. I don’t know how long we’re staying in Texas but Law assures me we can take all the time we need for me to meet my new family. After dinner, she insists we stay and tells us the guest room is already made up for us.

“No arguing with me. You stay here for as long as you both want. This is your home, too.”

That was hours ago. My grandmother bid me goodnight and turned down my bed for me with a kiss on my cheek and another weepy hug. I always felt like I didn’t belong with my mother. I never fit what she thought I should be and when I met Zeus it was more of the same, even when I tried to be like him.

Agnes doesn’t make me feel like that. My grandmother is the kind of sweet that my mother hated in me. I feel like I fit with Agnes and that heals the whisper of ‘what is wrong with me?’that I always had in my ear.

There’s nothing wrong with me. I was just with the wrong people. I look at Law and my heart feels so full that I think it might break through my chest. He’s the right person for me to be with. He’s the only one I want to be with. He’s always seen the good in me.

My husband.My Daddy.

The dynamic that settled effortlessly between us bloomed into something so much stronger than I ever imagined. It’s wound itself around us, worked its way beneath our skin and into our bones until it holds us together as one piece. It’s turned what we have into something perfect, just as sweet and fragrant as the roses blooming in the night air.

I grab his hand and give it a squeeze. We’re sitting on the porch steps taking in the cool night air.

“It’s not so bad when the fucking sun goes down,” Law grumbles, leaning back on his hands to look up at the sky. “Can’t beat the view,” he says with a whistle. It’s near midnight now, I think and while it’s dark out, the sky is bright with stars. They fill the night sky, pin pricks of light that make everything down here feel so small and insignificant. I feel dizzy from staring up at them, I have to look away.

I look at Law and smile. My eyes can’t help but be drawn to the man I get to go through life with from here on out. I’m not alone. Neither is he. It doesn’t matter how big things get, we’ll always have each other.

Daddy and little.

“It’s perfect,” I tell him.

He’s right, you can’t beat the view.