Page 69 of A Love Like Christmas Time
“The fuck is my help going to do?” I set down my fork before I become the new topic of a murder podcast.
“Mind your tone, young lady.”
“Yeah, no.” I shake my head and put the napkin from my lap onto the table. Even the thought of food is almost enough to make me throw up all of a sudden. “You don’t get to ask for my help on this.”
“Why? You’re my daughter, Lauren. Family is supposed to help each other.”
“I guess they are.” I force my face into a tight smile. “Which is exactly why I’m going to tell you the exact same thing that you have told me for half my life. I will not be taking any sides in this. You're adults, sort it out amongst yourselves. I’m staying out of it.”
“What do you mean by that? And you should eat your food before it gets cold.” My eyes dart over his face as I bite back a snide reply. Is he seriously this oblivious? That much of a hypocrite? Or does he only care this little?
“It means that for the past twenty-nine years, you’ve managed to dodge any actual parenting by waving your little ‘I’m not taking sides’ flag. Which, sure, sounds very Switzerland of you, but it also meant that mom got to run the whole operation. You gave her free rein to ignore my wants, my needs, mydreamsand let her do whatever she wanted to fulfill her grand plan of turning me into a Stepford wife instead of what I actually wanted.”
I shake my head, my heart beating into my throat, clammy hands resting on my jeans-clad thighs. I will never forget theday Mom pulled me out of theater class, the one thing that made me excited for school, because she found it childish and it clashed with an etiquette class she signed me up for. Whatever she’s trying to pull on him, I just can’t find it in me to care.
“I will not be getting into this. You two are grown-ups. You can deal with this among yourselves.”
“But you don’t understand—”
“Oh, I understand it awfully well,” I say coldly and shift in my seat. “I know exactly what kind of person mother is. I don’t need to be involved in your little—” I wave my hand vaguely through the air, “situation to see what she’s trying to pull. I’ve been trying to tell you what she was like for years, but you’ve never bothered to listen. Hell, you never even bothered to learn that I don’t eat fish.” I nod towards the plate in front of me. I take a deep breath.
Why am I even bothering? I can yap for hours about how hypocritical his demand is. He hasn’t listened to me in the past, so he’s not going to start now.
“I hope the divorce gives you both what you’re searching for and what you deserve.” I get up.
“Lauren, wait—”
“No.” I shake my head and stay on my feet by the table. “You’re my dad, and I love you, but you failed me. If you’re trying to make things right now, you can start by earning my trust before asking me for favors. But this?” I point between the two of us. “That’s not the kind of thing you open the ‘Hey, I messed up. Let’s fix things’ conversation with. Get yourself a cutthroat lawyer and let them deal with mother. But keep me out of this.”
He opens his mouth to speak, but I don’t want to hear it. Without another word, I grab my coat and rush out of the restaurant, only stopping once the fresh air hits my face.
“Fuck.” I curse and stomp my foot for lack of anything to kick. Oh, what I would give for a lovely, kickable pile of snow.
My phone suddenly blares from my pocket.
“Hey, Nic,” I greet her surprisingly jolly. “Can you order us an emotional-eating dessert special? I’ll be back in ten minutes.”
“Gotcha.”
I hang up and let the phone slide back into my pocket.
Of all the ways I thought this day would go, this was not on my bingo card. I’m waiting for the heartache that is supposed to come when you learn your parents are splitting, but there’s nothing.
Does that make me a bad person?
Then again, they’re the ones who replaced me. He couldn’t stand up for me on Thanksgiving or when they took Maisie and her family to Disneyland, but now he wants me on his side.
The more I think about it, the more my blood boils.
Deep breaths, Lauren. They’re not worth the anger. I let out a deep sigh and turn right, deciding to walk to my apartment that I refuse to call ‘home’ anymore.
Chapter 27
Lauren
“Lauren, we have to go!” Nic is shaking me awake. Pretty strongly.
“Relax. I’m awake. And you’re about to give me whiplash,” I mumble, blinking my eyes open. “Is there a fire?” I ask her sleepily. But she doesn’t stop shaking my shoulder until I sit up, glaring at her with the fury of someone torn from sleep.
